Monday, January 17, 2011

Party Boy gets some Balls

Party Boy totally blew me off last night.

He's done it once before. I had been exhausted one night and just wanted to kick it in a bed, preferably with him, and chill. And by chill I mean snog our brains out.  Instead he ditched out on me, with a quick kiss and pat on the ass, to join his friends. Man I hate Party Chasers!

You see, there are those of us who, "Are the Party," and then there are those who, "Chase the Party". Partyboy is a Party Chaser. Most people grow out of that phase with age, but he's 32 and still chasing the scene. I on the other hand prefer to be the scene, but to each their own...

I went out last night to a hidden club in Korea Town. It sits side by side to a gentlemans club. I know, classy right? But as ghetto as the outside was, the inside revealed a totally different scene. Warm wooden floors, great lighting, tribal theme. Henny's man was spinning and so was a mutual friend of ours so we all rolled out.

I knew that Partyboy was heading back home to Vegas for 4 days the next day. I had seen him briefly a few nights ago. Much to long to ensure that my scent still lingered on his body. I wanted to see him again before he left.

I text him a few times, telling him to let me know when he was off and to come find me. No response.
I knew he was working till 2 am so I didn't think much of it. I partied the night away with my friends till 2am rolled around, then gave him a call.

He garbled a few incoherent words my way over the phone, perfectly normal for him. He usually drank while working, the end result being he was always completely wasted by closing time.

He says to me, "Um, I'm sort of in the middle of a conversation.  I'll call your right back."

Call me back? Its 2am. I'm pretty sure I made it clear I wanted to see you. Ugh, annoying. Screw it.  I hang up and decide to find my own after party.

I call up Hippie Chick to see where she's at. True to form the second she answers the phone she says, "Are you coming down?!"

"Yep, where you be?"

She and rest of the Hipster crew were at some birthday party at Pauly Shores house behind the Comedy Store off Sunset.  I cruise down and hit the location around 3am.

The place is a trip! Gated entrance, bouncers at the door, the music can be hear all the way down the strip. She told me to give the bouncers her name to get in but it wasn't necessary. I'm a hot chick rolling up by herself. They open the gate without a word and let me pass.

There were people everywhere. The house is spread across 3 levels and I'm having a hard time figuring out where the joint starts and ends. I walk up a flight of stairs and across a patio with a built in bar and see a couple of guys that I recognize as Partyboys friends. I debate on walking over and saying hi, but decide to save it for later. I continue my search, pleased that his friends will be sharing that I was at this house getting my party on after he had ditched me.

I walk up another flight of stairs and find my crew kicking it on a couch near the DJ booth. Hippie Chick is looking cute as ever in a short floral baby doll dress, tights and gold embellished belt. I love how at 5'11" she can still come across so dainty and cute. I walk over and say hi to everyone. I can see they're totally rolling balls. I enjoy the enthusiasm of their greeting and decide that I'm super happy that Partyboy ditched out on me. This is way better than drunken Partyboy kiss's.

"Where's PartyBoy?" Hippie Chick asks me.

"Hell if I know. Kicking it at work still I guess," I tell her.


She rolls her eyes and promptly starts introducing me to every guy within a 5 foot radius of me. I love my friends.

Homeless Boyfriend comes up to me to say hello, or so I thought. Instead he looks me intently in the eye and says, "I am not Homeless. I have a home!"

I almost died laughing! I guess HC had left my blog open on Homeless Boyfriends computer and he had read a few entries. He had yet to get to the blog where I had dubbed him Homeless Boyfriend but apparently she had told him the nick name I had created for him.

"You're taking it out of context!" I tell him. "Read the blog first, then you'll understand."

"Change it!" He yells. " I have a home!"

At this point I'm really laughing and about two seconds away from ordering T-shirts that read, "I have a home!"

"No way Jose!" I say, "Its funny! I'm leaving it. Besides, it doesn't really matter what I call you guys. There are no leading men in my blogs. You're all just backround actors that I toss around the scene to give my heroines something to bounce off of."

"No, its fine. I get it," he laughs. "Actually I read a bit, and I have to tell you. Thats some quality ass blogging. I'm a follower. I'm going to keep reading it."

I smile. I love it! Homeless Boyfriend is an Internet Social Guru and his opinion holds weight.

I get a text from Partyboy, "Sorry babe. I got carried away with coworkers... gotta catch a flight tomorrow."

Dick.

I know your catching a flight. Which is why I called you. I wanted to see you. But whatever. I'm over it and over him. I hate feeling like I'm the only one making an effort to see someone. I'm a busy girl dammit, I don't have time to chase!  And what's the deal with him calling me babe? He's done it a few times before. So creepy. Don't call me babe. I'm not anyones babe. Reminds me of exes of Christmas past..ew. Sends creepy shivers down my spine...

I text back, "Nice meeting ya. Safe trip. Bye."

The text had my desired effect. My phone rings a few moments later. I let it go to voice mail. I don't bother listening to it.

After a few minutes I shoot him a text instead that says, "Your friends are here."

I know this line will get him. That boy is beyond attached at the hip to his friends. One of them, I'll just call him Glasses, is the owner of the gorgeous Hollywood hills house we partied at on New Years.

Partyboy is new to the group and beyond desperate to be a part of their scene. The fact that I was kicking it with them will totally drive him nuts. Granted it has nothing to do with jealousy about them kicking it with me. More that he wasn't there kicking it with them. Yeah, I know, gay. But hey, that's text book Party Chaser feelings.

"You brats!What are you guys doing?!" he texts.

Set'em up and knock em down...

I text back, "Hollywood mansion birthday party. I just got here. I saw Glasses on the first floor somewhere. I haven't said hi yet...I think I'm on the third...your fault. I called. I'm willing to bet you would have had a better time here with me...this place is poppin off...I think its Pauly Shores place...his ass is walking around here somewhere..."

He calls me again. I let it go to voicemail. What? I told you. Its loud.

I call him back after another couple of minutes tick by.  He asks me questions about the scene. I answer some, can't hear most. The music is loud and there's no where to go to hear him better. But I can hear him well enough to recognize the lame excuses he's ranting about. He tells me again how he has an early fight and has to head home.

"I know that, " I say. "Thats why I called you an hour and a half ago."

I'm done with all of this. I want to have a good time. I'm not sure why he's still talking to me. He's of no use to me. He's heading home and therefore has no relevance to the rest of my nights good time.

I cut him off and say, "Ok, cool. Talk to you later."

He mistakes my comment for girlie anger.

"Don't be a bratt," he tells me.

"I'm not," I say.

I just honestly cant figure out why you're still on the phone with me dude? Your not my man. I don't need nor have I asked for excuses. I'm trying my best to hold back the bitch. All I want to say is, Ok bye, your boring, gotta go.

"Well, I'll be flying back on your birthday on Thursday so I'll meet up with you at some point that night," he tells me.

Oh you think so huh? I'm torn on this statement. I'm really not the kind of girl who feels the need to secure a date for special events. Especially one like my birthday. Do you have any idea how many free drinks and Birthday kisses a girl can receive on a night like that? I dont want this guy smothering my mojo.

"Yeah, just text me" I tell him.

He doesnt know what to say. I know I should let him off the hook and tell him that I'm not mad. But like I said, by this point I've lost interest and dont much feel like putting forth the effort.

"Ok, well be safe and looooovvvveee ya!" he tells me.

Uh, ok.

I hang up without saying goodbye. I figure I can blame it on the noise later.

Talking to a hot guy on the phone is like talking to a fat phone sex operator. They're only interesting if you can concentrate on their sexy voice and visualize a good looking hot body to match. But at the moment all I can hear is dumbass and I'm too tired for visualizing.

I return to the party. Partyboy's friends come upstairs and join us. These are total party guys. I've never met them when they weren't completely trashed. I do adore Glasses though. He is always happy, and is hopping around dancing as usual. Then there is his partner in crime, hmmmm, not sure what I should call this guy. Lets just go with Douchebag. Douche for short. Douche is a class A gropper. He's one of those types of drunks that always has a thin layer of sweat across his face, drink in hand and for the life of him can't keep his hands to himself.

Douchbag grabs me and drags me out to the dance floor. I love to dance, but prefer to do it alone. I have no problem walking up to a guy and asking him to dance. I just prefer to get my groove on alone. With a guy you have to pay attention and they want to talk to you and then there is always the inevitable groping.

Well Douche takes it to another level. He keeps pulling me close so that he can push is groin into mine. Gross. I push him away.

"You can't handle me can you? I'm too much for you aren't I?" he says to me.

What the hell is that supposed to mean?

He follows with,"I can't help it. I'm Italian."

"Well I'm half Puerto Rican, so I guess that means we should hate eachother no?" I say to him.

He blinks a few times and wipes the sweat that's accumulated above his lip. Who ever told this guy he was hot?

He continues to grab my waist and pull me towards him. I keep moving his hands away from my ass.

"What?," he says. "Do you have a boyfriend or something?"

"No," I reply. "I'm very single. Its just that I'm talking to one of your friends so this is totally not cool man."

He blinks again. Thinking isn't one of this guys strong points. The light bulb finally turns on.

"Ooooohhhh!" he says, "Thats right. Partyboy...I love that guy."

For a moment I think I dodged a bullet...but nope. He reaches again for my ass and then takes a swipe at my crotch.

I'm done! I turn around and walk off the dance floor without saying good bye. What an asshole. Nice fucking friend.

I find my group kicking it in the living room. Glasses is leaning against a table doing his trademark party bounce.  I walk up to him and put my arms around his shoulders. This guy really is just plain likeable.

"So, are we still on for my surprise bithday party?" I ask him.

A few days ago Glasses had told me that he was throwing a dinner party at his house the following weekend. I told him that it was my birthday weekend, and after some joking from me and great wingman sidebars from HC, the whole event had some how magically turned into a surprise party for your truly.

He replies, "Oh yeah, its happening"

I'll believe it when I see it. Even though he's made the promise twice, the promises were made while he was drunk.

I also reminded him that we were going to be roomies.  Another drunken discussion from a few nights before. The pad in the Hills has a few extra bedrooms that no one was using. One of them even has its own bathroom. I would only need to pay $800 a month to live in this gorgeous home, utilities and cable included. Oh and did I mention he had maid service? As I saw it there were only two downsides.

One, Douchebag.  I'd have to buy a padlock for my bedroom door and hide cameras to make sure the coast was clear before I exited my bedroom.

Two, Partyboy. I mean, I'm West Coast Carrie. It will be difficult to date multiple men, in order to feed my readers their daily Blogs, if I have a guy I'm talking too popping in and out of my pad. What's worse is I will stop talking to the guy at some point, and yet I would still be forced to see him.

No thanks! When I'm done with a relationship I'm the out of sight out of mind kind of girl. I want to pretend you never existed and disappear. Difficult to do if the guy is getting drunk in my living room 4 days a week.

But the pad and party atmosphere may make it worth while. Just think of all the things I would be able to write about?

Its getting late, or early, again. I ask HC if they're ready to go. Their ride left a while ago and I told them they could hitch with me since I'm my classically sober self as usual.  We all head out and I finally get home at around 5 am.

I shoot another quick text to Creeper. Just a sad face.

Nothing. Boo. I head off to bed.

The next day Partyboy sends me a text. I laugh to myself thinking, "I almost forgot about you buddy."

"How was the rest of your night?!" he asks.

I smile to myself. I'm totally over my annoyance with him. I had too much fun last night to care. I decide I want to play.

I respond with, "I'm not talking to you. We're fighting."

I'm hoping I can get some playful banter going. I'm already thinking up ways he can make things up to me..All dirty. All totally doable.

"Oh...that's right, you're a girl," he texts back.

What the hell? Asshole. I was kidding dumbass. God, I really miss Creeper sometimes. He gets my dry humor.

After a few moments I start to smile. Partyboy got some balls. Huh, who knew? This is way better than the nervous dope he usually is around me. I like a boy who bites back.

I respond,"Ew. Not gonna play along? Boring."

"I'm kinda confused...But I have to turn my phone off now getting ready to taxi out. Cheers!" 

God, why do the pretty ones always have to be so stupid?

I decide not to respond. He's on his way back home and I'm positive I wont hear from him till Thursday. A girl from out that way had posted on his Facebook a few days ago how excited she was he was coming into town. I personally have a guy or two in 2 states and 1 island I can date when traveling so I have no doubt he will be doing the same. I'm ok with it.  I'm a firm believer that 2 zip codes cancel each other out so I'm not hating on him.

Besides, The Kid is coming out to visit me in 2 weeks. I'm so excited!  He lives out of state near my family and I usually only get to see him for a few hours or a whole day if I'm lucky when I'm out that way.  We have been doing a casual long distant thing for almost 3 years but this is the first time he has come to LA to visit. He's bringing a friend with him that I've partied with a few times in the past so it should be a blasty blast!

I was worried at first about what to do with Partyboy when The Kid got here but it seems I've misread the situation. This whole time I thought Creeper was going to be the casual don't give a shit guy and Partyboy the nester. But I had it backwards. It looks like Partyboy will be beyond easy to avoid that weekend and Creeper...well, he still hates me.

Oh Creeper. What to do, what to do about you? I'm going to try to text again. Give that vulnerable apologetic girl thing a try that Daria suggested.

As far as you Partyboy? I'll be here waiting when you bring your new found balls back.

WCC

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