RIP Kid

I never thought I would be saying this...but I think I'm done. I'm done with The Kid...

...

After picking me up from my mom's house, The Kid took me to an artsy part of town where we did a little shopping and strolled the streets together. We went to an underground wine lounge for appetizers and drinks. It was fun and romantic. Afterwards we headed to the bar where Goodtimes bartends. It was the perfect opportunity for us to spend some time with our mutual bestie while enjoying free drinks.

I stayed at his house yet again that night. We didn't have sex...yet again that night.

 

I think part of the problem is that the guy gets much too stoned! I may not get high often, but when I do I can still function. And by function, I mean get my freak on. Not The Kid. All he wants to do after a hit from the ganja is pork out and pass out. The same thing happens once he's been drinking. If he does attempt the bump and grind in a drunken state, he more often than not can’t finish the job. It's so frustrating! I mean can you even call it sex if the guy doesn't orgasm?

I should stop. I'm making The Kid sound like some drugged out deadbeat. He's not. Overall he's a great guy. For one he owns his own house. He purchased it in his mid-twenties. Pretty impressive for a small town boy. Plus whenever we go out, he always takes care of me. Every family event I've ever taken him to he has made sure to pitch in with money for food or booze. More often than not he brings a bottle or two with him. He can be sort of a snob when it comes to vacations and food outings. He ski's and plays volleyball on a league. He always looks pulled together and never leaves the house without splashing on a healthy dose of cologne.

His main downfall? He lacks passion. I'm a very affectionate person. I love to hug and kiss the one I'm with...often.  Most of all I love to have sex. I so rarely get the opportunity so when a pre-approved sexual partner is around I like to take full advantage. But love making with him leaves me cold. It leaves me wanting. I always say I'd rather have no sex than bad sex, so why is it that I'm willing to I settle for the soft calm, oh so annoyingly gentle, love making of The Kid?

I guess because overall, I just plain like the guy. We're friends. We've always been friends. I've enjoyed the fact that the two of us never treated each other like boyfriend/girlfriend. We've gone months in the past without speaking. When he did text it was always casual and easy as pie. Just a quick hi/bye with a side of, “What’s new?” This last year has been the most I've seen him since the first time we met. Mainly because this is the first time in a long while that the two of us have both been mutually single.

I think I've stared at him for too long this time. I can now see what I chose to ignore before. The Kid is not the one for me. Not because he lives far away. Not because he isn't good in bed. He's not the one because bottom line is; the guy is kind of dull.

When he's not drinking, The Kid is quiet and calm. When he is drinking he's obnoxious and impotent. What kind of personality choices are those?

It felt different in the beginning. He was the first person that I had been attracted to after my divorce. I liked him because he was good looking and well...calm. The complete opposite of my ex. He was calm and fun. He never tried to control me, or ever raised his voice. We enjoyed watching movies together and getting stoned while listening to music. I loved hanging in his space, partying with his friends and making out with him all night.

Wait, that's it! That's what this trip has been missing. That was the one thing The Kid always had going for him. He was an amazing kisser. The best I’ve had actually. I could care less about the sex, but the lack of kissing is a crime!

He has only leaned in for a kiss on his own accord once since I got here. We were at a gay nightclub downtown and he had grabbed me and pulled me in for a wet one. I had to be the one to break us apart. He was drunk as a skunk and obviously feeling confident and sexy. Since then I’ve been the one to pull him in for an occasional smooch. Of which there have not been many… 

I slept over The Kids house on Friday night. Well not so much as slept over as passed out on his couch. His cousin was in town so we all stayed up late watching movies and getting stoned. We made our way to the bedroom in the early morning. Don’t get excited. Nothing happened. Something would have if I had made the effort, but I didn’t want to.  I wanted The Kid to make the first move. There have been too many times in the past where I was the one to pull him in for a naked embrace. I'm over it! If he wants me, he knows where to find me.

Needless to say, he never started the search.

The next morning we hung around the house eating Thanksgiving leftovers and watching movies. The two of us really do seem more like friends than lovers most of the time. The Kid and his cousin decided to go hat shopping in the artsy part of town he had taken me to a few days before. I was feeling crusty and tired so I had him drop me off at my mom’s house so that I could re-beautify myself. I told him I would catch up with them later.

I went back to my aunts later that night. My cousin had driven into town from LA as well for the Holiday so I spent the evening drinking and eating with them. The kid shot me a text telling me he had decided to get some early Christmas shopping done with his cousin.

"No worries," I text back. "I'm partying it up at my aunts so I'm good. Just let me know when you’re done."

"Ok," he replies. "I still have to drive out to my uncles and drop off my cousin so I'll be a while."

The Kid sent me a few more text asking my opinion about various gift ideas for his mom. It was cute. It made me feel like the two of us were in a relationship. Maybe that's what it is? We have seen each other so much lately we had become like an old married couple. We loved spending time together and sharing what was happening in our lives. We enjoyed the comfort and the familiarity of the situation. Maybe the passion was gone because we were too familiar with each other?

No. That's Bullshit. The guy is dull.

The party began to die down and everyone finally decided to head out. My sister and I dropped my mom at home and decided to hit the town for the last hour of drinking time. I hadn't heard from The Kid since much earlier that evening. I figured he was partying it up with his family the same way I had.

I received a text from Goodtimes just as we were getting back into my sister’s car.

"Where are you? We want to hang," I respond.

"Downtown," he immediately replies. "Come!'

I swear sometimes I wish Goodtimes was the one I was dating. Damn that boy is attentive...and fun. I had spent an entire day with him a few days before. The Kid had been sleeping off his latest hang over as usual. So Goodtimes took my cousin, Double D, and I to the movies followed by a little bar hopping.  He paid for everything. I was calling him Daddy Goodbucks all night. It’s funny; when I’m back at home I speak to him more often than I speak with The Kid. He’s my out of state version of Glasses.

My sister and I finally hit the downtown strip. We stopped into one of my favorite nightclubs first.  They have great music and a variety of rooms to wander around in. Goodtimes had text me that he was a block away at another night club but we figured we would catch up with him later.

As the two of us were walking through the bar we saw a familiar face. It took a few minutes for us to realize it was The Kids cousin. The one he had been hanging out with all day. Which meant that somewhere in this joint, was The Kid.

My first instinct was to call out his cousin’s name. I stopped myself just in time. Alerting him of our presence would have been a bad call.

For one, this was a girl’s night out. The two of us planned on whoring it up sister style. My sister truly is an amazing wing woman. It had been ages since I had met anyone new in her city.  It was time for me to mingle and enjoy myself, boy free.

Second, his presence meant another thing. It meant The Kid had ditched me.

What a dick! I was only in town for one week! I had just spent the night and most of the day with the guy, but that asshole still had the nerve to go night clubbing without me?

When he had visited me in California with Goodtimes, I had spent all my time and energy on his ass.  I had taken 4 days off of work in order to lavish my attention and knowledge of the city on them. Since my arrival Goodtimes has called me on the daily to hang. But here was this asshole, ditching out on me so that he could booze it up behind my back? Dick. Dick. DICK!

A split second before my sister reached out to touch The Kids cousin shoulder, she hesitated. Well not so much hesitated as pulled a Matrix. The girl literally bent backwards and pulled her body away from him in a way that reminded me of the bullet dodging Matrix scene that has burned its way into pop culture memory today. She just missed grabbing his attention and blowing our cover. Thank god her mind works almost the same as mine.

 

I turned around just in time to see The Kids back disappearing around the corner towards the dance floor.

My sister and I looked at each other and said in unison, "We gotta go!"

We hurried our way out of the club and onto the street.

"That was The Kids cousin right?" She asked me.

"Yeah," I told her. "The Kid was there too. I saw him walking ahead of him."

"What an asshole," she says. "Why wouldn't he tell you he was coming down here? He knows you like to party here. Even Goodtimes called you to tell you what he was doing. What’s his deal?"

"Hell if I know," I say. "Let's just head somewhere else."

Downtown is a long strip of unlimited bars and restaurants. We head into a sports bar across the street (they have a DJ spinning at night. Fun.). We met some interesting characters and scored a few free drinks from the beefy but attractive bartender. Even so, I was barely having a good time. I couldn't believe The Kid! I was so disappointed.

Right on schedule, Goodtimes gives me a call at closing.

"What happened to you," he yells at me over the phone.

"We decided to bar hop," I say back laughing. "We’re in front of the Sportsbar, head over here!"

"Be there in a sec," he tells me.

Meanwhile I spot a group of out of state hipsters standing off to the side. Fascinated, I walk over and engage them in conversation. Might as well keep busy while I wait right?

I glance over to my left to see if I could spot Goodtimes and his crew. Instead, I see The Kid.

He’s walking in the middle of the street with his cousin…and two girls in tow. The girls don’t look particularly attractive. Short and slightly overweight. I grab a few of the hipsters and use their bodies to block The Kids view of my sister and I. Luckily he was walking the opposite direction and hadn’t see us.

A few minutes later Goodtimes walks up, giving me a quick pat on the ass.

“You talk to The Kid?” He asks me first thing. “We should head over to his house and have some drinks.”

“He’s here,” I respond.

“What, where,” Goodtimes asks, looking around.

“My sister and I saw him inside of the club across the street earlier,” I tell him. “We bailed and ran over to the Sportsbar instead.”

“Why? Did you call him,” Goodtimes says confused. “Maybe he’s still here.”

“I know he’s still here,” I reply. “I just saw him walking down the street with his cousin and a couple of chicks.”

I said this very matter of factly. No emotion, no anger. Honestly I wasn’t mad that he was with some fat broads. I was more  hurt that he had decided to ditch me for the evening.

“Really,” Goodtimes says, looking confused. “Dude, I’m sure that’s nothing. Let me call him.”

“No,” I say, slightly panicked. “If he wanted to hang with me tonight, he would have called. Let him do his thing and I’ll do mine.”

“Why, are you here with someone,” Goodtimes asks. “Like did you meet someone else that you want to hang with right now?”

“No,” I answer. “Ofcourse not.”

“Ok then,” Goodtimes says, pulling out his phone and dialing.

I immediately turn around and start to walk away. My sister had wandered to the side with the Hipsters and appeared to be ordering tacos from a roach coach.

“Why are you walking away,” Goodtimes asks following me.

“I’m just checking on my sister,” I tell him.

The truth was, I didn’t want to be standing there while he spoke to The Kid. I felt embarrassed. I’m not sure why. I guess I didn’t want The Kid to know that I had busted him. I didn’t want him to know that I knew he had screwed me over for the night. I didn’t want the drama. I didn’t want an explanation. I just wanted to enjoy what was left of my evening…Kid free.

Goodtimes must have read my thoughts because he closed his phone and followed me to the taco truck without another word.

The next day I received a text from The Kid in the afternoon.

The first said, “Whats up?”

I chose to ignore it. Mainly because the only response I could think of to say was, “Nothing dick.”

He text again a few minutes later, “Me and my cousin hit the town.”

A completely unsolicited confession huh? Goodtimes must have spilled the beans. So here this ass was trying to make himself sound like a good boy by sharing his night with me. Whatever.

I text him back three hours later…just to make a point.

“I know,” I finally said. “We walked right by you guys. Twice.”

“Really,” he answers. I got a very clear image of him raising his eyebrows innocently. The bastard has amazingly dark sexy eyebrows. “Outside or inside? We were with my cousin’s wife’s bff and her daughter…black dude magnets. I’ve never seen guys that aggressive in a club before.”

 Another confession. Hilarious.

"Both," I say, ignoring the rest of his text.

"Wow, I didn't see you gals. You should have jumped on me," he says, inserting a smiley face. "We might go watch Immortals later. You wanna check it out?"

I was so annoyed! I mean seriously? Why would I want to go hang out with the dick?  Maybe the girls really were nothing. But his excuse explained little. After all, they were his cousins wifes friends. So basically perfectly hookupable. And why would I go jump on him and tell him I was there? I'm not the type to force my company on others. I'd prefer to spend my time with people who value mine.

I hate these situations. I hate feeling this way. Unappreciated. Undesired. The lack of affection all week had been bad enough, but to ditch me like that? For a couple of broads who would obvioulsy still be here after I left? Such bullshit.

I don't respond. I don't know what to say. I don't know what to do. It was my last night in town. I had expected to spend it with him. Was this it? Was I done? Was this enough to end our 4 year romance?

"I'm going to take a power nap first," he text a few minutes later.

I waited an hour before I sent a response.


"K," I text.

He responded immediatley with, "Goodtimes has to pick up somone from work at 9, so the 10pm showing is the winner. What time is your flight tomorrow?"

I laugh to myself. I had never received such a quick response from The Kid. Especially during his nap time. I begin to feel bad. I mean maybe the girls were nothing. Maybe his cousin wanted some bonding time alone with his cuz. Maybe The Kid was just an idiot. He obviosly felt guilty. Even if I did decide to not speak with him again, did I really want it to end like this?

"Not until late. I'll text you later on when we are on our way," I say.

What the hell. It's not like I will be seeing the guy again anytime soon.

"Cool, sounds good!" he says. I can feel his relief.

Later that night, Double D and I head to his house.   I was nervous! I wasn't sure how how I was going to react to seeing him. My answer? Not well.

"Hey," I say after he opens the door.

He reaches out and pulls me into a hug. I avoid looking him in the eye. I can't seem to bring myself to do it. My cousin and I walk inside and take a seat. Goodtimes hasn't arrived yet so we have about a half hour to kill.

The scene is almost comical. The Kid won't sit down! He is running around the room cleaning up and talking his ass off. 

"Yeah man, last night was crazy," he starts off. "I couldn't believe how aggressive the black dudes were. I was actually starting to feel uncomfortable."

The Kid pauses for my response. I know he was expecting me to say something like, "Oh really? How so?," or "So what did you do?'

Instead, I decided to be a bitch and not say a damn thing. My cousin DD followed my lead. She, much like my sister, is another badass jokester. She often calls me in the middle of the night to ask my advice on how to torture the men in her life...just for fun.


After a few uncomfortable moments, The Kid continues is rambling.




I just sit there quietly. I answer a few of his questions, but only when he is not referring to the night before. He finally takes the hint and drops the subject all together.


I'm just not digging the whole situation. I didn't want to be there. I wanted to go home.


The Kid leaves the room and I turn to my cousin.




"Dude, how funny is The Kid right now?" I ask her. "I mean is it just me or does it seem like he is bugging out?"


"Oh yeah he is, "she replies. "He's so funny. I like how you wouldn't comment on his night. He didn't know what the hell to do." 




"I know," I say. "Took the ass long enough to realize I didn't want to talk about it. I don't know dude. I kind of wanna just go home."


Just as I made my decision, Goodtimes walks in followed by a scraggly haired girl and a little person. And by little, I mean a 3 foot midget.




My cousin and I exchange looks. Well there's no way in hell we can leave now! Leave it to Goodtimes to retain my interest in any situation.




He introduces us to his friends from work then we all gather our things to leave.  A part of me still wants to go home, but I couldn't figure out a way to do so without causing a scene. So instead I walked to The Kids car and got my unappy ass in.




The Kid was even more out of control at the movies than at his house. The two of us had been to the movies dozens of time with over the years and not once has he ever done what he did this time around. The guy actually put his hand on my leg! The entire movie he was rubbing my thigh and grabbing my hand. The Kid and I are not hand holders. On top of that, he wouldn't stop talking during the movie. He found any excuse he could to make a comment about the flick. I must say, it was pretty fun watching the boy squirm.






After the movie we head back to his place. I knew he expected me to stay the night. It was my last night in town. Our last chance to sleep together. I was positive he would pull out all the stops that night for me. Well, I'd be damn if I was going to give the guy the pleasure.




I sat down on the couch and began to plan my excape. I didn't want anyone to know I was leaving out of anger. I needed a legitamet excuse. The second I sat on the couch The Kid plopped down next to me. Well more like on me, than next to me. His leg was practically covering mine and his hand found my thigh again and gave it a squeeze.




That was it. I had had enough.




All of the attention and affection he was giving me was way too much, way too late. Where had this guy been all week huh? Did it really take guilt to make him treat me like someone he liked?




"So we gotta get going," I tell him after a few episodes of Family Guy.




"What, why, " he asks, looking concerend.




"My mom has to go in early to work tomorrow so she needs her car," I tell him.




It's a perfectly legitamate excuse. A complete lie, but believable enough for him not to question me.




I stand up to leave, my cousin following close behind me.




At the door, I turn around and give him a quick peck and a short hug.




"So what time is your flight," he asks me.




"I need to be at the airport at around 4pm I think," I tell him.




"Ok, I'll give you a call in the morning," he says to me. "Maybe we can grab lunch or something."




I give him a quick smile and turn around and walk to my car.




He didn't call the next morning....or the one after that.




He's texted a few times since then. I've responded, but we both know things aren't the same.




I don't know what the future holds for the two of us. All I know is that I'm done. Done with the relationship part. I don't want to pretend. I don't want to force it. The guy just doesn't do it for me anymore. I'm calling it. Time of death? Right fucking now.




I'm happy we ended on a good terms. Now I won't have to worry about things being awkward in the future, because whether the two of us want to or not, we will be seeing eachother again.




Afterall, Goodtimes is still our mutual Bestie.





WCC