Nip Tuck

I had to kick Partyboy out of my bed last night because honestly? I'd rather have no sex than bad sex....

It's St Patricks day, another Holiday First for me and the occupants of The Plex. None of us were sure what we wanted to do. I was exhausted as usual from partying the night before with Mr. Boston and Partyboy. We had went to Nails house a few blocks from our place. It was supposed to be a mellow get together but instead I ended up getting way to stoned and staying up till 4am. I was a total zombie at work as usual. I swear it's a miracle that I'm still employed....

I got home at 6pm with intentions of staying in for the night, but Hippie Chick was not having it. I finally gave in after a quick 20 minute power nap on her bed. I know I should go to sleep and get ready for my 6am call time at work in the morning, but the thought of missing out on the nights potential adventures was to much for me to bare.

I wash my face in hopes of faking my alertness and ransack my closet for something green. I end up with a tight black BCBG bandage skirt with a tucked green tshirt. The neckline is split open showing just the right amount of skin. I throw on a couple of necklaces and my suede booties and I'm Red to Go.

I walk into the living room where I find The Street Artist sitting at my desk. "Hey Boo," he says. I go over and give him a hug. "I think it's time for us to get engaged," he tells me.

"Let's do it!" I reply excited.

We've been fake girlfriend/boyfriend on Facebook for a good month or so now. It was time to kick this cyber relationship up a notch.

"So I was thinking that either I can get shit faced drunk tonight and propose to you or we can wait until my birthday next month and have you propose to me." He says.

"I think it would be funnier if I proposed to you," I tell him. "Which means I need to plan out something great."

My wheels are turning. This is going to be fun! How often does one get an opportunity to plan a fake marriage proposal? Like never! I'm going to make it a good one...

We're all starved so we start the night off by ordering some food from 88 Chinese and Sushi. Sooo good. We sit and grub down as we try to plan out our evening.

Partyboy is absent from our group. He left to hang with some friends a few hours before with the promise that he would meet up with us later. So its just Homeless Boyfriend, Hippie Chick, Mr. Boston, The Street Artist and one of HC's girlfriends, who I like to call Feathers, rolling out for the evening. We finally decide to head to a bar up in Hollywood.

Being the co-dependant group that we are, we all pile into my too small car pretending to fit. The group is lapping it and loving it. We cruise down and score ourselves some front row parking. A great way to start off the night. We head inside to the almost empty club. The place is a huge warehouse with a stage to the right and couches laid out to the left. The bar is against the back wall, so we head over to get our first drinks for the evening.

I scan the room for potentials. I'm out and looking hot and its way past the time for me to find myself a local Boo. This waiting to see The Kid every few months business is getting old. I need to find someone who I can get my mack on locally. I look around and spot nothing. Time to go to Plan B. I text Partyboy, "The Plex Force is up and ready to go...where'd you guys end up?"

What? I don't see any potentials around here, might as well send out the bat call for my flirting partner. Guess I enjoy the, 'look but can't touch' tension that happens between he and I.

"In Venice for about an hour than I'll text you when we'll be back around." He responds.

Guess I'll have to hold out till than. Boring. That's one of the shitty parts about being single. Sometimes friends are just not enough. Some nights you really want and need someone to look at you with a bit of lust in their eyes. Some nights you just need someone to not only want you but actually try to have you.

The bar isn't getting any fuller so we start to discuss where we should head off to next. I look down and see that Partyboy is calling me.

"Chello?" I answer.

"Where are you guys? I'm going to start heading back your way." He responds.

I give him the cross streets and than hang up. I'm getting excited. Times been a wasting between Partyboy and I, and I feel the need to speed things up.

We finally decide to head to Dragon Fly down the street. We pile back into my car and head over. I shoot a quick text to Partyboy with the directions to our new destination.

"Roger Dodger!" He sends back.

We pull up to Dragon Fly and walk up to the front door arm and arm. The front door is charging a $15 cover but Feathers takes care of that. Everyone in my Hipster crew has a connection somewhere or the other. She just so happens to have a free pass to just about every joint in town. We walk inside with a 'wave and thank you' to the door guy and into a jammed packed house. There's a DJ spinning on stage with a live Reggae rapper. We are barely able to squeeze our way up to the bar. Everyone grabs a drink while The Street Artist and I make our way to the base of the stage. We bounce around a bit to the music before the massive crowd forces us to spit ourselves back out.

"Let's go outside," Hippie Chick says.

We all nod our heads in agreement and head out to the outside bar. Much better. We squeeze up against a wall and finally relax a bit.

"Where's Partyboy?" Hippie Chick asks me.

"He's on his way," I tell her.

"Dude, you need to make that shit happen already." She says to me.

Great. HC is drunk and plotting my sex life again.

"Make what happen?" Asks Feathers.

"Her and Partyboy. You have to see these two together. I mean, you can cut the tension with a knife. But can you believe they haven't slept with each other yet?" HC asks her.

"You and Partyboy?" Feathers asks me with a grin on her face. "Hell yeah, you need to do that. Have you guys hooked up at all yet?"

"Yes," I answer her. "A few times. I mean I never slept with him or anything but we fooled around a few times."

"Carrie's self restraint is legendary." HC chimes in. "She spent almost 24 hours with him alone in her apartment fooling around. The guy even went down on her and she was still able to hold back."

I laugh and shrug my shoulders. What can I say? No one can convince me of doing something I don't want to do. No matter how persuasive they may be.

"And good thing I didn't," I say to both of them. "Imagine how it would have felt to have slept with him and than find out he had a girlfriend the whole time? No thanks."

"Oh screw it. You just need to sleep with him and get it over with already!" HC tells me. "Right Feathers?"

"Hell yeah you do," Feathers says nudging me with her arm. "Just fucking do it man! Tonight. Make it happen."

"I can't," I tell them laughing. "He's to skittish with me."

"Carrie, just throw on your charm and tease the hell out of him. You know your the master at this shit. Make him beg. Make him want you. Than screw the hell out him!" HC yells, making pumping motions with her arms and thrusting her hips at me.

I must say, her little speech is pretty convincing. I mean, I do feel like I was cheated out of my planned birthday Partyboy screw. It would be great to get him out of my system. What better way than to release some sexual tension with well, sex? Up to this point I haven't really been very flirty with the guy. If anything I've intentionally kept my distance from him physically and emotionally. I wonder what would happen if I turned on the Carrie charm? Maybe tonight is the night to find out?

Just than, right on schedule, Partyboy texts, "Out front."

"He's here," I tell the girls. They both look at each other. Oh yeah. This is so happening tonight.

Instead of getting him in we all decide to head out. It's late and the place is packed. Party at The Plex is sounding like a better alternative. We head outside to find Partyboy waiting for us.

He walks over and pulls me into a hug. HC and Feathers are both looking at us, so he releases me quickly and gives HC a hug as well. The boy is so transparent.

Homeless Boyfriend, Mr. Boston and Streets are still in the club trying to squeeze there way out. It's cold out and us three girls are freezing our asses off.

"Why don't you and Partyboy grab the car and bring it around front," Hippie Check says.

"Let's go Partyboy," I say grabbing his arm. I make sure not to look at Hippie Chicks face. I can feel the devilish smile she's rocking; I don't need to see it.

We walk the two blocks to my car arm and arm. The conversation is light. He pulls out what looks like an old mans corn pipe. He lights it up as we continue our journey. Man this guy is funny.

We cruise back to the front of the club where the crew is waiting on the curb. There are now seven of us so I pop the trunk. The Street Artist hops in without a word and shuts it after himself. I love it! I'm totally going to buy some type of portable Christmas lights and string them up back there. I might as well create a cozy atmosphere in my trunk for Astro, Streets or any other of the occasional drunken trunk occupants.

We stop by the store to pick up some drinks and head back to The Plex. Once inside Hippie Chick and Feathers head into her room to watch some reality TV. Mr Boston says his goodnights and heads to bed. It's just me kicking it with the boys. Partyboy pulls out a bottle of whiskey and pours a few shots. Homeless Boyfriend, Streets and PB all take a shot.

"Give Carrie one," Partyboy says, grabbing the bottle and pouring me a glass.

I take it and shoot it down. I can feel it burning its way down into my stomach. Man, I'm totally going to feel that later.

"See, Carrie's got balls man. Here take another Carrie," PB says trying to refill my glass.

"I'm good I'm good, " I tell him walking away. I know what he's doing. He does this every time we're together. He wants to loosen my inhibitions. Like the way he does. He is always at his flirtiest when he's loaded.

The first time we met he was full of swagger...and Booze. He had been so confident. I mean the guy stole a kiss from me while his date was in the other room! How hot is that? But the second time we saw eachother while he was working? He was a nervous jittery mess. I had to ask for his number remember? We hang when he's sober no problem. Totally flirt free. I can sense how nervous he is around me during those times. But once he starts to knock back the drinks? The man is pulling me in for couch time.

I think that's why he pushes drinks and joints my way all the time. He wants the two of us to be at the same level. What he doesn't realize is I don't need booze to do what I want to do. I just do it. Sober and proud baby! If I make mistakes I take full responsibility. But honestly I rarely make mistakes, even through the most impulsive of decisions. More often than not everything works out in the end, or I atleast end up with an amazing story to share with you dear reader. Always a win win in my life...

I spend the next hour bouncing between HC's room to hang with the girls and out in the living room with the boys and their drunken antics. I can see Partyboy stealing looks at me when ever he thinks I'm preoccupied. Little does he know I'm never preoccupied. I see all. I remember. I write.

At one point I try to go to my bedroom to change. Partyboy see's me heading that way and grabs me. "Where you going? Get back here," He says to me. Yep. He's drunk and bold.

He pulls me out to the balcony where Homeless Boyfriend and Streets are smoking out. Partyboy joins in and passes it over to me. Whatever. I'm home now. Might as well get my St Patty day buzz on.

The conversation is fun hilarity as usual. Someone makes a joke about The Street Artist not having any balls...or penis. "Yeah, you just have a sexless mound like a Ken doll." I tell him laughing.

He finds my statement funny and decides to prove me right. I turn my head just before The Street Artist drops his pants and tucks his penis for the boys to see.

"You really just did that," Homeless Boyfriend says cracking up.

I still have my back turned laughing my ass off. I finally hear him zipping up so I turn around. Mistake. Partyboy is now unzipping his pants and sliding them off. This night has definitely gone awry.

I quickly turn around again. I don't know what the future holds for me and Partyboy, but for now? We are totally just friends. And I don't want to see my friends penis on my balcony no matter how funny it may be.

He pulls them down and tucks his penis as well. Streets pulls his tucked pee pee out again and continues the gag. Homeless Boyfriend can't decide whether to laugh or kick them off the balcony at this point. My back is turned and I'm holding onto the glass door when I feel someone press up against me...

Partyboy has now wrapped his free arm around me and is humping his tucked pelvis up against my back. Ok, "Mr I have a girlfriend". This is not proper behavior for a spoken for man. I would be pissed. With a squeal and a backwards shove I express my unhappiness with this situation.

"Ok, that's enough Partyboy. Leave her alone," Homeless Boyfriend tells him.

Partyboy stops and turns back around, still with his pants pulled down.

"Pull up your pants PB," Homeless Boyfriend continues. PB complies.

"Now zip them up," HB says.

Partyboy continues to follow directions. It's pretty funny. There is something about Homeless Boyfriends voice and tone that makes you feel like you can trust him. And that you should listen. Thank god Partyboy does. The humping wasn't one of the most respectful acts towards me. If The Street Artist had done it I would have killed him. I'm aware that I'm cutting him a little more slack than usual because of our past relationship. Also because I now know without a doubt that this boy still desperately wants to get into my pants.

I leave the boys and their Ken doll mounds on the balcony and head into Hippie Chicks bedroom to tell the girls what just happened. The second I get to the good part of the story the boys come crashing in. They are all good and drunk. I can't take the chaos so I go back out into the living room and sit down at my computer. Partyboy follows me out. This is so in the bag.

He grabs a hat off our coat rack and puts it on my head. "That looks cute on you," he tells me. "You should wear it all the time."

I laugh and turn my chair around to face him. He sits down next to me and grabs a pair of sunglasses off the table. He places them on my face smiling. He's dressing me like I'm a doll and apparently having a good time doing it. I laugh. He's a funny guy. Confused, but funny.

The boys come back out and head into the kitchen to take a few more shots. I'm exhausted so I decide to take this opportunity to sneak off to my bedroom. I have to work at 6am the next morning and it's already way pass my bedtime.

I head into my room and change. I throw on a pair of grey cotton shorts with a navy tank top. I leave my bra on. With a house full of drunks I want to be able to run out of my room comfortably if they decide to burn the place down. I lay down and immediately begin to fall asleep.

I'm not sure how long I laid there. Thirty minutes perhaps? I'm 2 seconds away from dreamland when I hear my name being whispered through my door. It's Partyboy.

"Carrie? Carrie? You in there?" I hear him ask.

"Yeah, it's open. Whats up." I call back, even though I know what's up. Or what he hopes to get up I should say.

He opens the door and walks in. My light is off but a ray of the hallway light is falling on him.

"Check out my new hat," he tells me turning around in his spot so that I can view it from all angles. He's wearing a white helmet. I have no idea where it came from. All The Plex occupants love our hats and costumes. He was probably snooping around the house and found it somewhere.

"What the hell?" I say laughing. "Let me see that!"

He comes over to my bed and takes the helmet off so that I can see it. Oh yeah, this is happening. I mean screw it! I'm down for some Partyboy action. Enough is enough. If he's to shy to make a move I'll do it. I have no shame. I'm single and he's obviously willing so let's be fucking adult about this shit and get it over with already.

I take the helmet from him and turn it in my hands. Partyboy lays the upper half of his body on me. His head is resting on my hip. I put the helmet down and start rubbing his head with my left hand. This is not a friend to friend head rubbing. I'm a girl who knows what she's doing. I scratch my nails across his scalp lightly. I pull his hair a little as I massage his scalp. I hear him moan his appreciation. Encouraged I take my fingers and press them into the back of his neck tracing a line from the back of his ear to the base of his shoulders.

He presses his face into my hip but that's the extent of his participation. I twist my body into a more comfortable position and pretend that I'm readjusting to go back to sleep. Partyboy leans back and lays on one of my pillows. I sit up and shake him a bit. He laughs and closes his eyes. Screw it. If the boy wants to be seduced I'll play along. I'm single and free and have very little shame when it comes to what I want.

I begin to rub his chest over his wife beater. I occasionally let my fingers slip under the bottom piece of his tank. I do this for a few minutes until I tire and lay back down. Ok, I'm not actually tired, I just want to see what he'll say.

"Ahhh, why did you stop? Why do you always have to stop when it starts to feel good?" He whines to me.

I laugh and and sit back up. I lay next to him and continue my caressing. I progressively get bolder and bolder. I slip my hand under his shirt and begin rubbing his bare skin. He takes his right hand and grabs my thigh, lightly squeezing me everytime I get near his pants. I start to lightly rub his lower stomach right above his crotch line. He has the fingers of his left hand wrapped through his belt loop and I notice that he's slowly pulling his pants down. His pant line is getting lower and lower everytime I make another pass. I know that any minute he will have exposed himself compeletly. I decide not to make him wait.

I rub my hand down his thigh along the outside of his pants. I want to see if he's excited before I decide to get this show on the road. I reach over and press my fingers against his crotch. Oh yeah. Partyboy is ready for his curtain call. He presses himself against my hand and moans again.

I on the other hand am getting a bit frustrated. This whole, "I'm partially asleep and not really paying attention" routine is getting old. I need some participation already!

My door is still open so I get up and shut it. I go back to the bed and straddle Partyboys torso. He grabs my thighs with his hands and pulls me towards him as he whispers,"You are so bad!"

Yeah right. I'm the one who's bad? Whatever you say Mr Magically disappearing pant guy.

I lean down and kiss him. Meanwhile he slips his pants the half inch it takes to expose his full erectness to me. He reaches up and pulls my shorts to the side trying to push himself into me. I don't know what's up with this guy and not using protection? I wasn't game for it last time, I don't know what makes him think I'd be willing to do it now. Man I hope his girl uses protection with him. Who knows what he's picked up from his carelessness.

I move my hips to the side, fully aware of how easily he would slide into me if I let him. Hippie Chick is right, my self restraint is legendary. Instead I lean in to try to kiss him again. But he's not responding. His mouth is relaxed but he's not engaging with me. I know what a Partyboy kiss feels like. Lord knows we did a shitload of making out in the past. But I don't know what this slack mouth routine he has going on right now is.

I begin to get frustrated. He's still rubbing on my crotch trying to manuever his way in, all with out one pucker on my mouth. I mean what the hell? I'm not Pretty fucking Women man. Your not asleep doodey. You are participating already so this, "I'm being taken advantage of " routine is getting old.

I finally can't take it anymore. I'm not enjoying any of this. I mean, I've said it before, I like my men aggresive. I like my sex rough. I like my sex to be passionate. The dead man getting a massage routine was annoying enough, but this? This let me screw her but don't kiss her bit? It's beyond insulting.

Partyboy is still trying to get my shorts off when I roll off of him and push him away saying,"Partyboy, NO."

He lets me go and I roll to the side and slip back under my blankets.

"Sorry,"He tells me and stands up to slip his pants back on.

Sorry for what I wonder? I mean does he even know why I'm pissed? Probably not. I mean I was ready to go. I had a condom in my jewlery box and I was perfectly willing to make this one night stand happen. I just wanted to get the deed done already. All the sexual tension and build up had hit its boiling point. It was time for Carrie and Partyboy to get it on. But not like this. If I was finally going to do this whole casual sex thing I wanted it to atleast be good. And this was far from good. It was wierd and awkward and rude. I wanted passion and lust and....anything but this.

Partyboy finishes zipping up his pants and lays back down on my bed. He's got to be kidding me? Does he actually think he is going to sleep in here?

After a few minutes I sit back up and tell him, "Partyboy, you need to go sleep in the living room."

I don't know what makes this guy think that I want to wake up with him laying next to me? I mean what's next? Was he going to pretend he was sleeping and 'accidently' snuggle with me in the middle of the night? The magics over buddy, shows over, take a bow and get the fuck out.

He listens and stands up to leave. I notice him hovering a bit looking around my room for lord knows what.

I decide to test the waters one last time. " Come here. Give me a hug goodnight."

He obeys and walks back over to me. He gives me a quick shoulder hug, averting his face as he does it. Motherfucker. Get out.

He heads out of my bedroom and quitely shuts the door behind him. This is definelty not the way I forsaw this night going.

I roll over to go to sleep. It finally happened. I'm done with Partyboy. He wants me, he likes me, but he's kind of a douche. I mean seriously? What the hell was that? Does he honestly think that what he just did wasn't cheating on his girlfriend? I'm starting to feel bad for the girl.

This could have gone a totally different way. He should have just admitted what he was doing to himself and enjoyed the moment. Just have one night of hot steamy sex with me and than call it a day. I'm not interested in a relationship with the guy. I mean he's a total untrustworthy wreck. We could have easily done the deed and both walked away happy with a sweet memory. No harm done. No regrets. Just mutual satisfaction and than we would both shut the fuck up about it and never speak of it again. Now it's been ruined.

The next day Glasses calls me from Mexico. I haven't spoken with him in two weeks, and was beyond excited to hear from my bestieboo. I give him a very brief run down of what happened.

"That's officially the last time anything like that happens between us again," I tell him.

"Yeah right. You guys will hook up agian. It's inevitable." He says laughing.

"No way," I reply. "I'm done. That wasn't fun. And honestly now I'm a bit grossed out."

"Yeah, I get that. Man, I can't leave you people for a second with out you all getting into trouble." He says.

"Hurry back Bestie, I can't take it anymore." I say to him.

We talk for a while longer before he has to get back to work. I shoot Hippie Chick a text. I'm dying to tell her what happened.

"So I'm pretty sure I got zero sleep last night because Partyboy decided to invade my bedroom...I have so much to tell you..." I text, dangling the gossip in front of her.

She immediately bites. "What?! Did you bang?!"

"Got close." I send her. "I stopped it. It was totally not cool. I made him leave my room...I'm done with Partyboy."

And it's true. The magic is gone. Part of me wishes last night never happened. I loved having my hot steamy memories of our past fooling around. Now all I have is the wierd gross memory of last night. What a freak. Boo. Time to find someone else to lust over. The swagger has left the building and all we're left with is a confused, not confidant, drunken cheating mess. Oh well. All good things must come to an end.

Time to start my next chapter of dating wtih The Rocker. A new character I met from my online library of men. He's the lead singer in his band. I'm excited about that. I haven't had a man serinade me since Sinatra did back in January in the alleys of Beverly Hills.

The Rocker is about 6 feet tall with dark hair and light eyes. I'm not sure if his hair is long or short at the moment. He sent me photos both ways. Short, he looks like Robert Pattinson. Longer he resembles Orlando Bloom. Totally doable either way.

We go out tomorrow night. It feels good to be seeing a new guy. No more hanging onto a Partyboy memory. I feel free again. Wonder what tomorrow will bring? Will The Rocker be a freaky dream like The Creeper or turn into a wierd clingy stalker like The Highlander? Or will I get lucky and finally find my Cool Rider?

Guess we'll see. For now I need to deal with the latest text from Partyboy, "Hey you! I'm sorry about the awkward situation the other evening. I hope we are still cool? Will you smoke some peace pipe over a few jamaican patties with me?!"

I know I need to respond. We're heading to his bar later tonight to have a few drinks before we head to the latest and greatest houseparty rager. God, I miss the days when I could just ignore people. I'll text him back in a bit. I'll let him sweat it out for now.

Still no regrets on my part. I went into it knowing what I wanted. He wasn't able to do the same so now it's game over.

Sorry dear reader. Partyboy is not my Mr. Big. But I'll find him. And when I do, I'll make sure your the first to know.

WCC