Nip Tuck

I had to kick Partyboy out of my bed last night because honestly? I'd rather have no sex than bad sex....

It's St Patricks day, another Holiday First for me and the occupants of The Plex. None of us were sure what we wanted to do. I was exhausted as usual from partying the night before with Mr. Boston and Partyboy. We had went to Nails house a few blocks from our place. It was supposed to be a mellow get together but instead I ended up getting way to stoned and staying up till 4am. I was a total zombie at work as usual. I swear it's a miracle that I'm still employed....

I got home at 6pm with intentions of staying in for the night, but Hippie Chick was not having it. I finally gave in after a quick 20 minute power nap on her bed. I know I should go to sleep and get ready for my 6am call time at work in the morning, but the thought of missing out on the nights potential adventures was to much for me to bare.

I wash my face in hopes of faking my alertness and ransack my closet for something green. I end up with a tight black BCBG bandage skirt with a tucked green tshirt. The neckline is split open showing just the right amount of skin. I throw on a couple of necklaces and my suede booties and I'm Red to Go.

I walk into the living room where I find The Street Artist sitting at my desk. "Hey Boo," he says. I go over and give him a hug. "I think it's time for us to get engaged," he tells me.

"Let's do it!" I reply excited.

We've been fake girlfriend/boyfriend on Facebook for a good month or so now. It was time to kick this cyber relationship up a notch.

"So I was thinking that either I can get shit faced drunk tonight and propose to you or we can wait until my birthday next month and have you propose to me." He says.

"I think it would be funnier if I proposed to you," I tell him. "Which means I need to plan out something great."

My wheels are turning. This is going to be fun! How often does one get an opportunity to plan a fake marriage proposal? Like never! I'm going to make it a good one...

We're all starved so we start the night off by ordering some food from 88 Chinese and Sushi. Sooo good. We sit and grub down as we try to plan out our evening.

Partyboy is absent from our group. He left to hang with some friends a few hours before with the promise that he would meet up with us later. So its just Homeless Boyfriend, Hippie Chick, Mr. Boston, The Street Artist and one of HC's girlfriends, who I like to call Feathers, rolling out for the evening. We finally decide to head to a bar up in Hollywood.

Being the co-dependant group that we are, we all pile into my too small car pretending to fit. The group is lapping it and loving it. We cruise down and score ourselves some front row parking. A great way to start off the night. We head inside to the almost empty club. The place is a huge warehouse with a stage to the right and couches laid out to the left. The bar is against the back wall, so we head over to get our first drinks for the evening.

I scan the room for potentials. I'm out and looking hot and its way past the time for me to find myself a local Boo. This waiting to see The Kid every few months business is getting old. I need to find someone who I can get my mack on locally. I look around and spot nothing. Time to go to Plan B. I text Partyboy, "The Plex Force is up and ready to go...where'd you guys end up?"

What? I don't see any potentials around here, might as well send out the bat call for my flirting partner. Guess I enjoy the, 'look but can't touch' tension that happens between he and I.

"In Venice for about an hour than I'll text you when we'll be back around." He responds.

Guess I'll have to hold out till than. Boring. That's one of the shitty parts about being single. Sometimes friends are just not enough. Some nights you really want and need someone to look at you with a bit of lust in their eyes. Some nights you just need someone to not only want you but actually try to have you.

The bar isn't getting any fuller so we start to discuss where we should head off to next. I look down and see that Partyboy is calling me.

"Chello?" I answer.

"Where are you guys? I'm going to start heading back your way." He responds.

I give him the cross streets and than hang up. I'm getting excited. Times been a wasting between Partyboy and I, and I feel the need to speed things up.

We finally decide to head to Dragon Fly down the street. We pile back into my car and head over. I shoot a quick text to Partyboy with the directions to our new destination.

"Roger Dodger!" He sends back.

We pull up to Dragon Fly and walk up to the front door arm and arm. The front door is charging a $15 cover but Feathers takes care of that. Everyone in my Hipster crew has a connection somewhere or the other. She just so happens to have a free pass to just about every joint in town. We walk inside with a 'wave and thank you' to the door guy and into a jammed packed house. There's a DJ spinning on stage with a live Reggae rapper. We are barely able to squeeze our way up to the bar. Everyone grabs a drink while The Street Artist and I make our way to the base of the stage. We bounce around a bit to the music before the massive crowd forces us to spit ourselves back out.

"Let's go outside," Hippie Chick says.

We all nod our heads in agreement and head out to the outside bar. Much better. We squeeze up against a wall and finally relax a bit.

"Where's Partyboy?" Hippie Chick asks me.

"He's on his way," I tell her.

"Dude, you need to make that shit happen already." She says to me.

Great. HC is drunk and plotting my sex life again.

"Make what happen?" Asks Feathers.

"Her and Partyboy. You have to see these two together. I mean, you can cut the tension with a knife. But can you believe they haven't slept with each other yet?" HC asks her.

"You and Partyboy?" Feathers asks me with a grin on her face. "Hell yeah, you need to do that. Have you guys hooked up at all yet?"

"Yes," I answer her. "A few times. I mean I never slept with him or anything but we fooled around a few times."

"Carrie's self restraint is legendary." HC chimes in. "She spent almost 24 hours with him alone in her apartment fooling around. The guy even went down on her and she was still able to hold back."

I laugh and shrug my shoulders. What can I say? No one can convince me of doing something I don't want to do. No matter how persuasive they may be.

"And good thing I didn't," I say to both of them. "Imagine how it would have felt to have slept with him and than find out he had a girlfriend the whole time? No thanks."

"Oh screw it. You just need to sleep with him and get it over with already!" HC tells me. "Right Feathers?"

"Hell yeah you do," Feathers says nudging me with her arm. "Just fucking do it man! Tonight. Make it happen."

"I can't," I tell them laughing. "He's to skittish with me."

"Carrie, just throw on your charm and tease the hell out of him. You know your the master at this shit. Make him beg. Make him want you. Than screw the hell out him!" HC yells, making pumping motions with her arms and thrusting her hips at me.

I must say, her little speech is pretty convincing. I mean, I do feel like I was cheated out of my planned birthday Partyboy screw. It would be great to get him out of my system. What better way than to release some sexual tension with well, sex? Up to this point I haven't really been very flirty with the guy. If anything I've intentionally kept my distance from him physically and emotionally. I wonder what would happen if I turned on the Carrie charm? Maybe tonight is the night to find out?

Just than, right on schedule, Partyboy texts, "Out front."

"He's here," I tell the girls. They both look at each other. Oh yeah. This is so happening tonight.

Instead of getting him in we all decide to head out. It's late and the place is packed. Party at The Plex is sounding like a better alternative. We head outside to find Partyboy waiting for us.

He walks over and pulls me into a hug. HC and Feathers are both looking at us, so he releases me quickly and gives HC a hug as well. The boy is so transparent.

Homeless Boyfriend, Mr. Boston and Streets are still in the club trying to squeeze there way out. It's cold out and us three girls are freezing our asses off.

"Why don't you and Partyboy grab the car and bring it around front," Hippie Check says.

"Let's go Partyboy," I say grabbing his arm. I make sure not to look at Hippie Chicks face. I can feel the devilish smile she's rocking; I don't need to see it.

We walk the two blocks to my car arm and arm. The conversation is light. He pulls out what looks like an old mans corn pipe. He lights it up as we continue our journey. Man this guy is funny.

We cruise back to the front of the club where the crew is waiting on the curb. There are now seven of us so I pop the trunk. The Street Artist hops in without a word and shuts it after himself. I love it! I'm totally going to buy some type of portable Christmas lights and string them up back there. I might as well create a cozy atmosphere in my trunk for Astro, Streets or any other of the occasional drunken trunk occupants.

We stop by the store to pick up some drinks and head back to The Plex. Once inside Hippie Chick and Feathers head into her room to watch some reality TV. Mr Boston says his goodnights and heads to bed. It's just me kicking it with the boys. Partyboy pulls out a bottle of whiskey and pours a few shots. Homeless Boyfriend, Streets and PB all take a shot.

"Give Carrie one," Partyboy says, grabbing the bottle and pouring me a glass.

I take it and shoot it down. I can feel it burning its way down into my stomach. Man, I'm totally going to feel that later.

"See, Carrie's got balls man. Here take another Carrie," PB says trying to refill my glass.

"I'm good I'm good, " I tell him walking away. I know what he's doing. He does this every time we're together. He wants to loosen my inhibitions. Like the way he does. He is always at his flirtiest when he's loaded.

The first time we met he was full of swagger...and Booze. He had been so confident. I mean the guy stole a kiss from me while his date was in the other room! How hot is that? But the second time we saw eachother while he was working? He was a nervous jittery mess. I had to ask for his number remember? We hang when he's sober no problem. Totally flirt free. I can sense how nervous he is around me during those times. But once he starts to knock back the drinks? The man is pulling me in for couch time.

I think that's why he pushes drinks and joints my way all the time. He wants the two of us to be at the same level. What he doesn't realize is I don't need booze to do what I want to do. I just do it. Sober and proud baby! If I make mistakes I take full responsibility. But honestly I rarely make mistakes, even through the most impulsive of decisions. More often than not everything works out in the end, or I atleast end up with an amazing story to share with you dear reader. Always a win win in my life...

I spend the next hour bouncing between HC's room to hang with the girls and out in the living room with the boys and their drunken antics. I can see Partyboy stealing looks at me when ever he thinks I'm preoccupied. Little does he know I'm never preoccupied. I see all. I remember. I write.

At one point I try to go to my bedroom to change. Partyboy see's me heading that way and grabs me. "Where you going? Get back here," He says to me. Yep. He's drunk and bold.

He pulls me out to the balcony where Homeless Boyfriend and Streets are smoking out. Partyboy joins in and passes it over to me. Whatever. I'm home now. Might as well get my St Patty day buzz on.

The conversation is fun hilarity as usual. Someone makes a joke about The Street Artist not having any balls...or penis. "Yeah, you just have a sexless mound like a Ken doll." I tell him laughing.

He finds my statement funny and decides to prove me right. I turn my head just before The Street Artist drops his pants and tucks his penis for the boys to see.

"You really just did that," Homeless Boyfriend says cracking up.

I still have my back turned laughing my ass off. I finally hear him zipping up so I turn around. Mistake. Partyboy is now unzipping his pants and sliding them off. This night has definitely gone awry.

I quickly turn around again. I don't know what the future holds for me and Partyboy, but for now? We are totally just friends. And I don't want to see my friends penis on my balcony no matter how funny it may be.

He pulls them down and tucks his penis as well. Streets pulls his tucked pee pee out again and continues the gag. Homeless Boyfriend can't decide whether to laugh or kick them off the balcony at this point. My back is turned and I'm holding onto the glass door when I feel someone press up against me...

Partyboy has now wrapped his free arm around me and is humping his tucked pelvis up against my back. Ok, "Mr I have a girlfriend". This is not proper behavior for a spoken for man. I would be pissed. With a squeal and a backwards shove I express my unhappiness with this situation.

"Ok, that's enough Partyboy. Leave her alone," Homeless Boyfriend tells him.

Partyboy stops and turns back around, still with his pants pulled down.

"Pull up your pants PB," Homeless Boyfriend continues. PB complies.

"Now zip them up," HB says.

Partyboy continues to follow directions. It's pretty funny. There is something about Homeless Boyfriends voice and tone that makes you feel like you can trust him. And that you should listen. Thank god Partyboy does. The humping wasn't one of the most respectful acts towards me. If The Street Artist had done it I would have killed him. I'm aware that I'm cutting him a little more slack than usual because of our past relationship. Also because I now know without a doubt that this boy still desperately wants to get into my pants.

I leave the boys and their Ken doll mounds on the balcony and head into Hippie Chicks bedroom to tell the girls what just happened. The second I get to the good part of the story the boys come crashing in. They are all good and drunk. I can't take the chaos so I go back out into the living room and sit down at my computer. Partyboy follows me out. This is so in the bag.

He grabs a hat off our coat rack and puts it on my head. "That looks cute on you," he tells me. "You should wear it all the time."

I laugh and turn my chair around to face him. He sits down next to me and grabs a pair of sunglasses off the table. He places them on my face smiling. He's dressing me like I'm a doll and apparently having a good time doing it. I laugh. He's a funny guy. Confused, but funny.

The boys come back out and head into the kitchen to take a few more shots. I'm exhausted so I decide to take this opportunity to sneak off to my bedroom. I have to work at 6am the next morning and it's already way pass my bedtime.

I head into my room and change. I throw on a pair of grey cotton shorts with a navy tank top. I leave my bra on. With a house full of drunks I want to be able to run out of my room comfortably if they decide to burn the place down. I lay down and immediately begin to fall asleep.

I'm not sure how long I laid there. Thirty minutes perhaps? I'm 2 seconds away from dreamland when I hear my name being whispered through my door. It's Partyboy.

"Carrie? Carrie? You in there?" I hear him ask.

"Yeah, it's open. Whats up." I call back, even though I know what's up. Or what he hopes to get up I should say.

He opens the door and walks in. My light is off but a ray of the hallway light is falling on him.

"Check out my new hat," he tells me turning around in his spot so that I can view it from all angles. He's wearing a white helmet. I have no idea where it came from. All The Plex occupants love our hats and costumes. He was probably snooping around the house and found it somewhere.

"What the hell?" I say laughing. "Let me see that!"

He comes over to my bed and takes the helmet off so that I can see it. Oh yeah, this is happening. I mean screw it! I'm down for some Partyboy action. Enough is enough. If he's to shy to make a move I'll do it. I have no shame. I'm single and he's obviously willing so let's be fucking adult about this shit and get it over with already.

I take the helmet from him and turn it in my hands. Partyboy lays the upper half of his body on me. His head is resting on my hip. I put the helmet down and start rubbing his head with my left hand. This is not a friend to friend head rubbing. I'm a girl who knows what she's doing. I scratch my nails across his scalp lightly. I pull his hair a little as I massage his scalp. I hear him moan his appreciation. Encouraged I take my fingers and press them into the back of his neck tracing a line from the back of his ear to the base of his shoulders.

He presses his face into my hip but that's the extent of his participation. I twist my body into a more comfortable position and pretend that I'm readjusting to go back to sleep. Partyboy leans back and lays on one of my pillows. I sit up and shake him a bit. He laughs and closes his eyes. Screw it. If the boy wants to be seduced I'll play along. I'm single and free and have very little shame when it comes to what I want.

I begin to rub his chest over his wife beater. I occasionally let my fingers slip under the bottom piece of his tank. I do this for a few minutes until I tire and lay back down. Ok, I'm not actually tired, I just want to see what he'll say.

"Ahhh, why did you stop? Why do you always have to stop when it starts to feel good?" He whines to me.

I laugh and and sit back up. I lay next to him and continue my caressing. I progressively get bolder and bolder. I slip my hand under his shirt and begin rubbing his bare skin. He takes his right hand and grabs my thigh, lightly squeezing me everytime I get near his pants. I start to lightly rub his lower stomach right above his crotch line. He has the fingers of his left hand wrapped through his belt loop and I notice that he's slowly pulling his pants down. His pant line is getting lower and lower everytime I make another pass. I know that any minute he will have exposed himself compeletly. I decide not to make him wait.

I rub my hand down his thigh along the outside of his pants. I want to see if he's excited before I decide to get this show on the road. I reach over and press my fingers against his crotch. Oh yeah. Partyboy is ready for his curtain call. He presses himself against my hand and moans again.

I on the other hand am getting a bit frustrated. This whole, "I'm partially asleep and not really paying attention" routine is getting old. I need some participation already!

My door is still open so I get up and shut it. I go back to the bed and straddle Partyboys torso. He grabs my thighs with his hands and pulls me towards him as he whispers,"You are so bad!"

Yeah right. I'm the one who's bad? Whatever you say Mr Magically disappearing pant guy.

I lean down and kiss him. Meanwhile he slips his pants the half inch it takes to expose his full erectness to me. He reaches up and pulls my shorts to the side trying to push himself into me. I don't know what's up with this guy and not using protection? I wasn't game for it last time, I don't know what makes him think I'd be willing to do it now. Man I hope his girl uses protection with him. Who knows what he's picked up from his carelessness.

I move my hips to the side, fully aware of how easily he would slide into me if I let him. Hippie Chick is right, my self restraint is legendary. Instead I lean in to try to kiss him again. But he's not responding. His mouth is relaxed but he's not engaging with me. I know what a Partyboy kiss feels like. Lord knows we did a shitload of making out in the past. But I don't know what this slack mouth routine he has going on right now is.

I begin to get frustrated. He's still rubbing on my crotch trying to manuever his way in, all with out one pucker on my mouth. I mean what the hell? I'm not Pretty fucking Women man. Your not asleep doodey. You are participating already so this, "I'm being taken advantage of " routine is getting old.

I finally can't take it anymore. I'm not enjoying any of this. I mean, I've said it before, I like my men aggresive. I like my sex rough. I like my sex to be passionate. The dead man getting a massage routine was annoying enough, but this? This let me screw her but don't kiss her bit? It's beyond insulting.

Partyboy is still trying to get my shorts off when I roll off of him and push him away saying,"Partyboy, NO."

He lets me go and I roll to the side and slip back under my blankets.

"Sorry,"He tells me and stands up to slip his pants back on.

Sorry for what I wonder? I mean does he even know why I'm pissed? Probably not. I mean I was ready to go. I had a condom in my jewlery box and I was perfectly willing to make this one night stand happen. I just wanted to get the deed done already. All the sexual tension and build up had hit its boiling point. It was time for Carrie and Partyboy to get it on. But not like this. If I was finally going to do this whole casual sex thing I wanted it to atleast be good. And this was far from good. It was wierd and awkward and rude. I wanted passion and lust and....anything but this.

Partyboy finishes zipping up his pants and lays back down on my bed. He's got to be kidding me? Does he actually think he is going to sleep in here?

After a few minutes I sit back up and tell him, "Partyboy, you need to go sleep in the living room."

I don't know what makes this guy think that I want to wake up with him laying next to me? I mean what's next? Was he going to pretend he was sleeping and 'accidently' snuggle with me in the middle of the night? The magics over buddy, shows over, take a bow and get the fuck out.

He listens and stands up to leave. I notice him hovering a bit looking around my room for lord knows what.

I decide to test the waters one last time. " Come here. Give me a hug goodnight."

He obeys and walks back over to me. He gives me a quick shoulder hug, averting his face as he does it. Motherfucker. Get out.

He heads out of my bedroom and quitely shuts the door behind him. This is definelty not the way I forsaw this night going.

I roll over to go to sleep. It finally happened. I'm done with Partyboy. He wants me, he likes me, but he's kind of a douche. I mean seriously? What the hell was that? Does he honestly think that what he just did wasn't cheating on his girlfriend? I'm starting to feel bad for the girl.

This could have gone a totally different way. He should have just admitted what he was doing to himself and enjoyed the moment. Just have one night of hot steamy sex with me and than call it a day. I'm not interested in a relationship with the guy. I mean he's a total untrustworthy wreck. We could have easily done the deed and both walked away happy with a sweet memory. No harm done. No regrets. Just mutual satisfaction and than we would both shut the fuck up about it and never speak of it again. Now it's been ruined.

The next day Glasses calls me from Mexico. I haven't spoken with him in two weeks, and was beyond excited to hear from my bestieboo. I give him a very brief run down of what happened.

"That's officially the last time anything like that happens between us again," I tell him.

"Yeah right. You guys will hook up agian. It's inevitable." He says laughing.

"No way," I reply. "I'm done. That wasn't fun. And honestly now I'm a bit grossed out."

"Yeah, I get that. Man, I can't leave you people for a second with out you all getting into trouble." He says.

"Hurry back Bestie, I can't take it anymore." I say to him.

We talk for a while longer before he has to get back to work. I shoot Hippie Chick a text. I'm dying to tell her what happened.

"So I'm pretty sure I got zero sleep last night because Partyboy decided to invade my bedroom...I have so much to tell you..." I text, dangling the gossip in front of her.

She immediately bites. "What?! Did you bang?!"

"Got close." I send her. "I stopped it. It was totally not cool. I made him leave my room...I'm done with Partyboy."

And it's true. The magic is gone. Part of me wishes last night never happened. I loved having my hot steamy memories of our past fooling around. Now all I have is the wierd gross memory of last night. What a freak. Boo. Time to find someone else to lust over. The swagger has left the building and all we're left with is a confused, not confidant, drunken cheating mess. Oh well. All good things must come to an end.

Time to start my next chapter of dating wtih The Rocker. A new character I met from my online library of men. He's the lead singer in his band. I'm excited about that. I haven't had a man serinade me since Sinatra did back in January in the alleys of Beverly Hills.

The Rocker is about 6 feet tall with dark hair and light eyes. I'm not sure if his hair is long or short at the moment. He sent me photos both ways. Short, he looks like Robert Pattinson. Longer he resembles Orlando Bloom. Totally doable either way.

We go out tomorrow night. It feels good to be seeing a new guy. No more hanging onto a Partyboy memory. I feel free again. Wonder what tomorrow will bring? Will The Rocker be a freaky dream like The Creeper or turn into a wierd clingy stalker like The Highlander? Or will I get lucky and finally find my Cool Rider?

Guess we'll see. For now I need to deal with the latest text from Partyboy, "Hey you! I'm sorry about the awkward situation the other evening. I hope we are still cool? Will you smoke some peace pipe over a few jamaican patties with me?!"

I know I need to respond. We're heading to his bar later tonight to have a few drinks before we head to the latest and greatest houseparty rager. God, I miss the days when I could just ignore people. I'll text him back in a bit. I'll let him sweat it out for now.

Still no regrets on my part. I went into it knowing what I wanted. He wasn't able to do the same so now it's game over.

Sorry dear reader. Partyboy is not my Mr. Big. But I'll find him. And when I do, I'll make sure your the first to know.

WCC

Chocolate Wonderland

Note to self. Do not walk into a 5 star restaurant 15 minutes after you've ate a shit load of shroom filled chocolates...

The Plex is finally taking our first family trip together. Destination, Vegas baby!
I played it mellow the night before. I was exhausted from the weeks partying and wanted to be fresh and ready for the weekend. I layed across my bed at 10pm fully clothed and passed the hell out. Sometime around 2am or so I woke up to the sounds of music and chaos on the other side of my door. I considered getting up and joining them but decided against it. My bed was calling and I decided to answer it for once. I woke up a t 7am feeling good. It was time to pack.

I threw my supplies into a bag and shot The Kid a quick text. He had sent me one sometime during the night that read, "Where you at fool?"

I responded with, "Lol...soon. Soon."

The Plex occupants were dressed and ready to go so we all piled into our rental, picked up some breakfast burritos, and off to Vegas we went. The drive was ridiculous fun. We looked like a moving rave. Music blasting, arms raising the roof. We never lost our energy. None of us rested. Homeless boyfriend luckily only almost killed us once or twice during the ride. There was laughing and screaming, and a ton of planning for the weekend. We had picked up a few special chocolates that we planned on eating later that night. I tried them a few weeks before. Just a few bites. It was trippy mellow good time fun. Tonight was going to be a riot.

I get another text from The Kid, "Your late."

"Sorry, hit some traffic.Be there soon."

I'm finally starting to get excited about seeing my out of state man. As comfortable as I've been hanging on my own, it feels good to have someone who wants me....and who I want back. I haven't seen The Kid in a month...nothing for us but a lifetime considering that he's the only man I trust and care enough about to sleep with. I'm ok with not having a boyfriend. The no sex thing on the other hand? It's celibate torture.

We get to Vegas lickity split. I love living in such close proximity to sin city. We stop at a store and pick up booze and potato chips than head to our hotel. We are staying at Aria, compliments of Homeless Boyfriends latest connections. The casino is gorgeous. No two rooms are the same. Every pathway is a work of art. We secure two adjoining rooms and head up. Mr. Boston and I will be rooming together for the evening. We walk in and the lights and curtains automatically turn on and open up. Great view of The Cosmopolitan and Vdara. The two queen beds are cushy deliciousness.

Hippie Chick and I were exhausted from the drive. We decide to chill out while the boys head down to the casino and start in on the weekends gambling. The Kid texts me again, "I just woke up. Come over."

I wish. I'm a little tired and snuggle time sounds great.

"Can't. Stuck here...the guys are gambling...Come here lazy butt. Check out the insane Aria rooms." I tell him.

"Ok. We'll call you in a minute."

Yay! I'm gonna see The Kid! I'm exhausted but I know I need to start getting ready. I don't want him to show up while I'm in my traveling clothes with unkempt hair. That's the beauty of dating someone from out of state. They never need to see you looking like shit. I always have time to plan out every outfit, makeup and hair do. I love having the time to fake my perfection.

I jump into the shower and begin to get ready for the evening. I get to a point where my hair is done and I've started in on my makeup when I hear a group of people enter into HC and HB's room. The adjoining doors are open so I walk over to see who's there. It's another member of the ever growing Hispter Crew. I call this guy Snapshot. He's a photographer who runs around taking sweet photos of the party scene in LA. A little taller than me, goatee and a beanie always planted firmly on his head. He has sort of a Dave Navarro look going for him.

The crew is assembled so we decide to pull out the weekend goody bag. Three blocks of party time filled chocolate. I take a bar and cut it into three. I plan on sharing some with Goodtimes and The Kid. We each take our piece and tap them together in a mock cheers.

The deed is done. Let the good times roll.

We head downstairs just in time to see The Kid and Goodtimes rolling up. The Kid is wearing a black long sleeve button down and some dark sunglasses. Man I forget how hot this guy is sometimes. He's not as tall as I usually like my men, but his face and smile more than make up for it. I make a beeline for my boo, and he wraps me into his arms. Nice.

I pull out the rest of my chocolates and hand them to him and Goodtimes. They only take a bit and hand the rest back to me. Whatever, when in Vegas right? I pop another chunk in my mouth and wrap my arm around The Kid. We're all in it together now.

None of us have ate since the breakfast burritos earlier that morning. Homeless Boyfriend is in a panic to find us food before the poisoned chocolate hits our stomach. It takes less time than we had first anticipated. Hippie Chick and I are upstairs looking at a menu when the first wave hits us. We look at each other with wide open eyes.

"Oh, shit. I'm feeling it," I tell her.

"Me to," she answers. The menu on the wall is illuminated and is glowing to brightly for me to look at. The waitress leads us to our table and we all take a seat. "It just hit us," Hippie Chick says leaning into the table so that everyone can hear her.

The second she makes this announcement its like a bomb hits the table. All at once we're all totally tripping balls. The restaurant is a wonderland of colors and activity. Too much activity. We haven't even ordered, yet now we've lost any sense of time or taste. It seems like everyone in the room is staring at us. It's more than paranoia. They actually are. We are an interesting group. None of us really match with the other yet we all undeniably belong together. The word "Hollywood" seems to be floating above all of our heads.

Hippie Chick looks gorgeous in a black romper with a deep v neckline and Purple smokey eyeliner. I'm wearing a tight black dress, ankle boots with my blond and black hair pulled back with feathered earrings. Mr. Boston has on a powder blue button down with a navy vest. He is rocking a pair of matching neon blue sunglasses. Homeless Boyfriend has on a pair of shades as well and Snapshot is wearing a bright red shirt, black skinny jeans, beanie and his glasses. We are a bright colorful beautiful group, that have completely lost their ability to socialize in public.

The Kid sits down next to me and tries to engage me in conversation. I can't do it. My body is buzzing, the room is a kaleidoscope of colors and I can't wipe the stupid grin off my face. This is not the same mellow trip I had before. I've taken way to much on a completely empty stomach. I am so screwed.

"We need to get some food in us now," I say to the group.

"I can't do it,"Snapshot says.

"It's going to be like eating under water," Mr. Boston adds.

We all start to giggle at his statement. Bad call. We are two seconds away from having a complete laughfest meltdown. We somehow manage to pull it together.

Dinner was torture. The waiter won't stop asking us questions. He is by our side every two seconds. Mr. Boston can't stop looking over his shoulder to see if he's coming. The man seems to pop up unexpectedly with the sole purpose of scaring the shit out of us.

"Let's just act like we have a gig later and that we need to leave as soon as possible," Hippie Chick says to me.

"Ok, good plan," I reply. The waiter comes over for the millionth time and I look at him and ask for the check. I pause for a moment about to tell him about our gig later on when I realize I don't have a back story to support the lie. I stare at him for a moment, mouth open and completely blank.

"Yeah, um, just the bill thanks," I repeat after a few.

"Ofcourse," he replies politely. I'm sure he's used to this. Wild rockstars coming in causing a ruckus and staring at him with incoherent dilated eyeballs...

The dinner lasted forever. Part of me still thinks that I'm sitting at that table even now. He brings the check and Mr. Boston holds out his hand, "I got this, " he says in a deep self important voice.

We all giggle quietly as he grabs the bill and pulls out his card. We're way to out of it to divide it up. Better to have Mr Boston look like the baller and take care of it for us until we get back to reality.

Finally free we jump up and head straight towards the elevators to our rooms.

"Let's just chill for a few hours and reconvene at midnight yes?" Homeless Boyfriend says.

"Sounds like a plan Stan," I say back.

The walk to the room was awesome. I think the designers of Aria had moments like these in mind when they created this beautiful casino. All I want to do is sit on the carpet and stare at the basket weaved walls or the crystal pipes coming out of the ceilings. Luckily The Kid is having a lighter trip and drags me along after the group and back up to our rooms.

HC and HB go straight to their room and shut the connecting door. Mr Boston, Snapshot, The Kid and I head into my room and plant ourselves down on the beds.

We stayed in for the next 2 hours. Snapshot sat in the corner drawing the bulk of the time. Every now and than he would stand up looking for a map of the Casino. "I want to go down to the pool," he says. He picks up the phone to call the front desk but gets distracted while on hold and heads back to his corner to draw.

Mr. Boston is bouncing around the room. We had purchased a purple ball at the store earlier and he was throwing it around. "Is anyone else hot?" he asks us as he strips off his vest.

"Nope, just you Boston," I answer smiling. I'm sitting on the bed next to The Kid. He is layed out on his back and I'm sitting up next to him using his leg as a back rest. His arm is around my waist. I'd give anything to turn over and kiss him. Snapshot seems to sense my longing.

"Um, do you guys want to be alone?" he asks sounding genuinely concerned.

Ofcourse I do fool. I haven't seen my Boo in a month and I'm dying for some snuggle time. And by snuggle I mean hot sweaty sex.

"No," I say instead, laughing. "We're fine."

The Kid just laughs. Mr Boston is now rolling across the bed. Once he hits the edge he yells out, "I'm melting!" and than proceeds to promptly slides down to the floor.

I start to laugh uncontrollably. I'm so glad we are back in the privacy of our own room. We can now be as silly and tripped out as we want to be.

"I want to draw too!" Mr Boston says.

I get up and search around the room for another pen. After I hand one over I head to the window. One full wall is open to the city. The view is breath taking. I press my forehead against the cool glass and let my distorted vision take it all in.

Snapshot stands up to take a photo of me. I turn around to try to pose but I can't do it. Everything is just so funny to me at the moment. He attempts to take two shots, both without my face in them. He finally gives up and heads back to the phone to see if he can find the pool again.

After a few hours of giggly chaos I begin to feel a little lull in my trip.

"I'm feeling slightly normal," Mr Boston says mirroring my feelings.

"Me to," I tell him," Quick! putting on your shoes! Lets get out of here while we still can."

We all jump up and start to get ready like the place is on fire. We know that the effects of the chocolate are far from over, and we want to get downstairs before they pull us back down into wonderland.

We head back into the casino to look for Goodtimes and the rest of The Kids crew. After a few phone calls we finally spot them coming around the casino.

The guys want to pick up some more booze so we walk into a huge CVS on the corner. We are a boisterous group running about 10 deep. The guys all walk to the cooler and grab 40 oz bottles of Corona.

"You want one Carrie?" Mr. Boston asks.

"Yeah right, do I look like a beer swigger?" I respond.

"No," He answers laughing."I honestly can't think of anything that would look stranger than you chugging down a huge bottle of Corona."

The boys go to pay and I stand off to the side taking in the scene. Man people in Vegas are ugly looking. I mean this might be the chocolates talking but there be some scary looking people in the room.

I pull out my camera and snap a few photos. The boys finish paying and I snap an awesome shot of them toasting their giant Corona bottles in the store. Only in Vegas man.

We wander back onto the strip and head into the MGM casino. I honestly can't remember how we filled the next few hours. My high begins to dwindle and I find myself at a roulette table watching Mr Boston gamble. I look over to the right and see Hippie Chick and Homeless Boyfriend walking up. HC has changed into a pair of leggings and a t-shirt. Her face has been washed of her bedazzled makeup and she's wearing a pair of glassless black rimmed specs.

"Rough trip?" I ask her.

"Uh, yeah,"she replies. "I can't believe we left the room right now."

I laugh and turn back to look at The Kid. He asks me a question about our ride up to Vegas. I start to answer him when he reaches up to grab my face and pulls me in for a kiss.


Man I love this moment! We have it everytime we meet up. We spend hours in each others presence with little more than a few hugs and hand holding. Than wham! Makeout city. Always feels like the first time. You have no idea how it feels to constantly have a first kiss with the same person. Our chemistry is always set on repeat and it rocks. We spend a few moments lost in the kiss. We are still tripping a bit so the effects of the kiss are amplified. My body instantly warms up so I pull myself away before I throw the man down on the floor and strip him down in public.

We decide to leave MGM and head to another casino. I have no idea where so please don't ask. I know we are sitting at a electronic roulette table. The Kid and I are sharing a seat and I decide to turn around to give him another quick smooch. Well, a little turns into a lot and we are both lost in eachothers embrace for a solid 5 minutes. That's when I feel someone tap me on my shoulder.

I break away to see the roulette table dealer glaring at us.

"You can't do that here,"He scolds me.

I just look at him with a blank face.

He tries again. "You can do that anywhere else but this spot is for gambling. You two are going to need to go."

I continue looking at him like I don't speak any English until he finally gives up and walks away.

Leave it to me to get kicked out of a casino for macking down my man. I swear the universe is against me getting any action.

"What did he just tell you?" Hippie Chick asks me.

"He said we can't make out here." I tell her.

"Did he say you guys have to leave?" she asks.

"Hell if I know. I'm trippin right now. All I saw was hand gestures and nostril hair. I'm not going anywhere." I say,and we both laugh.

I turn around to check on The Kid. His eyes are wide open and he is covering his mouth with his hand.

"You ok?" I ask him grinning.

"I feel like I just got scolded by my high school teacher." He says through his hand.

I laugh and give him a shake. Poor guy. He has never been much of a PDA kind of guy. This is probably his worse nightmare. Amplified by the drugs and alcohol.

I'm pissed. Damn jealous looser dealer ruining my snosh time with my man. Grrrr. It's so time to go. We get up and head back out to the strip.

The rest of the night is a bit of a blur. We loose The Kids group again and he walks off with me and my crew. At some point we end up at New York New York. There's a little makeshift night club going on in one of the 'Deli's' in the casino. We all peer through the bars and see a DJ, strobe lights and bar. Mr Boston and I look at each other thinking the same thing. It's time to get our jiggy on!

We leave The Kid, HC and HB on the outside of the bars and walk around to the front entrance. The door guy checks our ID's and wraps a yellow 21 and over wrist band on us. We head inside and plant ourselves in front of the DJ near the bars where our friends are standing.

We start to groove to the music and let me tell ya, Mr Boston can dance!! I don't know if it's because the music is just really good or if it's the toxins running through our veins but we look like the best dancers in the world!!!!!!

We are scooping and sliding and bumping and grinding. I'm loving it! It's been a while since I've danced with a partner that can groove as well as I can. This is the first time in a long while I've been able to jam with a partner without having to worry about any groping or boring conversations. This is just about putting on a show and enjoying the act of dancing.

The music switches and we both look at each other with a sour face. The moods been lost so we walk back out and head towards our smiling friends.

"You guys were the shit," Hippie Chick says.

We smile and head out of the casino together. We start our journey back to Aria. Mr. Boston grabs my arm and pulls me back towards him, out of ear shot of our friends.

"So whats the plan? I'm sure you want some alone time with your guy right?" he asks me.

Damn right skippy.

"Yeah, um, why don't you just hang in the casino for a bit. I'll text you as soon as the coast is clear?" I tell him.

"Deal." He says.

"Damn, your the best roomie ever!" I tell him, giving him a high five.

We walk back into our casino and head towards the elevators.

"I'll catch up with you guys later, I'm gonna go gamble for a bit." Mr Boston announces walking towards the tables.

HC and HB wave at him looking confused. I say goodbye, keeping my face perfectly blank. I'd rather The Kid not know about my agreement with Mr Boston. I mean I don't want the guy to think I'm a floosy right?

We head up to the room and say goodnight to HC and HB. The Kid and I head into my room and while he's in the restroom I shut the adjoining door to HC's room. I turn on some music and take off my shoes, earrings and rings. He comes back in and lays on the bed. I lay next to him and we begin to chit chat about our crazy night out.

I tire pretty quickly of this and decide to get this party started. I roll over, covering half of him with my body and pull his face into a kiss. I feel is body respond to my touch and he pulls me in tighter. He reaches down and slips his hand up my dress and grabs my ass. Now we're talking.

We go from PG to R pretty quickly. I reach down and expertly unbuckle his belt and pull down his pants using my toes. A trick a learned in my youth. I pull up my dress and....well, just insert the word rodeo and worked into the appropriate slots.

Sex has always been...good, with The Kid. Not out of this world or mind blowing. Just consistently good. A girl like me needs more though. My last two partners described my love making with the same word. Passionate. I like squeezing and pulling. I want a guy to tell me what he wants. I ask often. I want to be looked at and slammed against a wall. I want to be bent over with a handful of my hair in a guys hand. I scratch, I bruise, I bite and purrrr. Love me, want me, squeeze me, hurt me, make me want to scream and cry out and sweat and breath all of you into me.

The Kid isn't really that guy. He's sweet and considerate. He always makes sure that I get mine but he's gentle and habitual when it comes to his love making. There's a moment where I decide to snap him out of his gentleness. I was on top of him and getting a little frustrated with the simpleness of it all. I decide to shock him out of his boringness. I sit straight up and start to move my body working him in a way that I know will blow his mind. I look down at him placing my fingers into his mouth and scorching him with my glare. He responds immediately. I can feel his body shudder under me. Hmmmm. Maybe there's hope for this guy yet...

Finally done with our much wanted and needed sweat fest, I roll over and grab my phone. Poor Mr. Boston has been sexiled from the room for 40 minutes or so. It's now 5am and time for all little good boys and girls to go to bed.

I shoot him a text, "Done and done."

"Wow, you just stopped me from going on an excursion that wouldn've of fucked me." He text back. He tells me later that when I text he was in line waiting for a taxi. "To go where?" I asked him. "Hell if I know," he tells me shrugging.

"Come home Boston, we still have one more night here." I text back.

I lay back down next to The Kid. He curls up next to me placing his head near mine. I turn over and kiss him on his head. Man I like this guy. I know one day all of this will have to end, but for now, he's still mine.

I close my eyes and begin to fall into dreamland. I hear Mr. Boston walk in, but I'm way to tired out to respond.

The Kid's phone rings a few hours later waking us up. It's Goodtimes telling him it's time to check out of thier hotel. I roll over and wrap myself around The Kids body. He pulls me into an embrace and we spend the next fifteen minutes locked in eachothers arms. We definitely didn't have enough time with each other. These quick trips are such a tease. I finally need to let him go, so I wrap a blanket around myself as he gets dressed. I walk him to the door and out into the hall. He grabs me around my waist and pulls me in for another kiss.

"You should stay another night," I tell him, whipping out my best pouty face.

"I wish. We all have to work tomorrow though. You'll be coming out my way soon though won't you?" He asks.

"Yeah, I'll figure something out soon." I tell him.

He turns to leave than stops and instead pulls me into another long kiss. We give eachother a final squeeze and he walks away. I head back into my room and lay back down in my bed. I can still smell The Kids cologne on my pillow. I pull it towards me and drift off to sleep for a few more hours surrounded by his scent.

See you later Kid. As always you'll be missed.

WCC

Beetles a Go Go

Hippie Chick told me that I need to stop Mind Fucking Partyboy. "I'm not!," I told her. He's the one with the girlfriend. If anything he's doing it to me."

Ok, I know I'm full of it. Premeditation is sort of my middle name...

A few days after Glasses going away party I got the itch to shoot Partyboy a text. I mean I just couldn't help myself. After I realized he missed me I wanted to see how far I could push him.

"Day 1 of no more Drunken Glasses has officially commenced." I send him. Innocent enough right? I was just sending him a text to acknowledge the fact that our mutual besty was out of town. hee hee hee....

"And so it begins! He is now Senor Glasses," He sends back.

I decide to kick it up a notch. "So I've decided that since he's gone you'll have to deal with my daily pestering for the time being."

I hold my breath waiting for him to respond.

"Well, I think that's fair. As long as I'm relevant," he responds.

Relevant to what I wonder? I consider asking him, but decide that I would be totally giving myself away if I did. A second later my cell pops alerting me of his next text.

"...and hopefully if/when I read your blog, I will have earned a more interesting nickname ;) haha."

A better nickname than Partyboy? Never.

"What is it that you want to be called?" I ask him.

"Just call me Awesome Blossom," he replies.

Annnnd that's why I'm the one who makes up the nicknames party people.

"Just be happy your name isn't 'Huge Asshole', 'Nutty as a Fruitcake', 'Whistle Blower,' or 'Pop a Sqaut' like some of the other people that I've written about." I tell him.

"Dammit!...You mean to tell me Pop a Squat is already taken??!!" he says.

"Lol. Yep." I respond. "She loves what I wrote about her...so much so that she forwards the link to people daily...it's one of the top 5 most viewed blogs...She's a dirty birdie..."

I'm having fun. There's something about texting with Partyboy that always makes me feel like I'm sneaking around. Like our conversations are forbidden and we might get in trouble if someone found out.

"Dirty birdies are close to my heart!" He says, followed by, "...Oh wait!...that's not where my heart is. Sorry wrong organ."

Oh yeah. We could get in trouble by someone like his girlfriend.

I'm not sure how to respond to this one. I had expected some incognito flirting, but not anything as open as this. The conversation has taken an interesting turn and I like it.

"So will I be seeing The Plex Force this evening?" he asks.

Hmmm, from penis reference straight to when we will I see you next huh?

"Um, not sure what we're doing yet. I'll let you know when I get home." I tell him.

I know he's working tonight. I also know that The Plex crew wouldn't be interested in partying at the bar again since we were just there for Glasses going away party.

"Copy that. Tell 'Homeless Boyfriend' I hope he has not filled my position at the office." he says. The last time Partyboy stayed at The Plex he had worked at my desk next to Homeless Boyfriend for the day. They had formed a nice little bond.

"Don't worry. I've been keeping the seat warm for you." I respond.
What? If he's going to forgo the incognito flirting so can I.
"Man I'm gonna need to do the Jamaican patties again before I begin my fast. Can I count you in?!" he says.

She shoots. She scores.

"Sure. I'll just drag you along on my next errands day..I told you, your my new Besty for now."

"Ha ha sounds good!" He texts back.

Damn right it sounds good.

I head home and get a call from a friend inviting me and my crew out to the grand opening of a night club at the Belasco Theater in downtown LA. That's one of the things I love most about being in this town. One minute your at work picking your butt, not having a clue as to what you'll be doing later and than wham! Options galore.

I decide to meet the crew down there. I need to swing by Dimples fathers birthday party first. I've been dreading this day for months. Like I said, I'm best friends with Dimples, and Huge Asshole is best friends with her husband. Its a horrible situation and I was not looking forward to running into him this evening.

Step one was to make sure that I looked ridiculously hot. I needed to be dressed for the night club later so I had a legitimate excuse to over do it. I chose a one shoulder solid blue, tight mini dress. I threw on my suede ankle boots and my favorite black and white speckled feather earrings. Done and done.

I cruise down to the party in all my hot glory but can you believe that the bastard wasn't there? It's funny, I had spent months freaking out about this day hoping that he wouldn't show, but now? I'm hating it that he didn't. I'm feeling good and cute and I really want to rub my, "I'm totally over you," hotness all over him. Oh well. I'll just have to settle for the photos and our mutual friends sharing with him later how great I looked.

I only stay for a few hours. I finally get the call from the crew that they're ready to go. I've secured passes for Homeless Boyfriend, Hippie Chick, Mr Boston, Street Artist and a guy I like to call Nails. He's a strange character. Decent looking guy. About 5"9 or 5"10. Always wears a suit with the nails on one of his  hands perfectly painted. Not sure exactly why he likes to paint the nails on just that one hand. Whateves. Just another member of my quirky crew. On my way to the club they give me a call to see if one of the Twisty Twins can get in as well. I'm tempted to say no, but decide against it. It's sort of good having these girls around. They make me feel better about being...well. Me.

I get downtown and pay for parking across the street from the club. Being from LA I would usually drive around and find something on the street, but I'm alone and dressed like a whore so decide against it.
(Ok, I'm not really dressed like a whore. More like a high class call girl.)

I get to the front of the theater and see my Hipster crew waiting for me near the entrance. I walk up and Mr. Boston is the first to give me a hug. "Wow," he says, looking me up and down. "You look freaking amazing."

I knew it! Damn Huge Asshole, why weren't you there tonight?

After hugs and hellos we give our name to the girl at the door and in we go easy peasy. The lobby is gorgeous! Gold framed mirrors line the carved walls in front of us. To the right I see a door that leads to a crystal lined bar. As usual we all make a beeline for the bartender. The room is just as lovely. Two story high ceilings, and red velvet booths placed against the walls. We all grab a drink from the diffused red lit bar and set to taking our nightly photos. I snag a pretty hot one with Nails. In it he is bending down in front of me hugging my hips. His eyes are closed and he has this look of pure serenity and love on his face. I'm giving a 'grrrr' face, biting my lower lip as I pull on the back of his hair. I know. We're total camera whores.

The timing of the picture was perfect. My phone pops alerting me of a text from Partyboy.

"Where'd ya end up?" He texts.

"Downtown at a old theater...new club opening," I send with the attached photo of Nails and I.

I snap a few more shots of the crew and the room before I put my phone away. It's time to explore the rest of the theater. I can hit Partyboy up later.

We all head out of the bar and walk through the double lobby doors into the main theater. Oh my god! The place is insane. The ceilings are 4 stories high for sure. To the left is another crystal lit bar. In front of us there is a huge dance floor placed in front of a raised stage. The DJ is spinning behind what looks like a huge flying saucer like turn table. On either side of him are GoGo dancers shaking their almost naked bodies to the electronic music that's blaring through the hall. The lighting is on point! Blue and red laser are shooting everywhere. We look up and see a gold foiled dome ceiling. There are lights and lasers shining up there as well. The venue spent quite a bit of money choosing patterns that would accentuate the gold carvings in the gorgeously carved ceiling. The DJ's name is lit up on the ceiling every few minutes. The place is sweet!

We all run down to the dance floor to get our groove on. There are no wall flowers in my crew. The Street Artist is shaking his tail feather to the music. I head over to him and spend a few moments dancing with my fake boyfriend. I'm having a blast. The whole room is lit by a diffused blue light. I'm letting the music pour over me as I let loose and dance the night away. On my own. No man. Just me and my friends and the music. I can feel eyes on me. I see a guy eye ball raping me a few feet away. Not bad looking. I'm just not interested. I don't even bother putting an extra twist in my hip cuz he's watchin'. Partially because I don't need to. I'm a girl who can dance. The other reason is because I don't really give a shit.

I'm starting to realize that its becoming less about not wanting a man and more about just wanting to be me. I'm enjoying hanging out with my friends. I'm enjoying dancing on my own. I look good for me, I dance for me, I'm happy just being me.

After a few hours Homeless boyfriend takes back control of the group and announces that we're going to Silver Lake to watch a Beetles cover band performing at El Cid. We leave the Night club close to 1am. Late for some but for me and my bouncy crew the night is still young. Hippie Chick jumps in the car with me and we get down to the club in two shakes of a lambs tail.

Love this place.  It's an outdoor indoor club. Reminds me of a spanish hacienda. The outside patio has two levels with its own wooden bar. Inside the rooms are dark and there is a huge lit fireplace in the corner. Heavy curtains are draped at intervals through out the room. We walk inside to the inner sanctum and get a view of the Beetles band. They are all rocking the 1960's Beetle bowl haircuts and the classic grey suits. And that's where the similarities end. They're faces looking nothing like them. I swear one of them must be named Mario instead of Ringo. But they're playing the classic and doing a pretty damn good job so I let the Mexican Beetle slide.

We all snag a drink at the bar and proceed to the dance floor to continue our dancing. I get another text from Partyboy.

"Shall I cab it to you guys?" He asks.

"We're in Silver Lake now...you off?" I respond immediately.

For a split second I feel a pinch of panic. How is he going to get to us? Than I'm instantly annoyed with myself. Why do I feel responsible for him? I've been having a great time all night on my own.  He's not my problem. Plus I can't figure out if he wants to come down because he loves hanging out with my crew or if it's because he wants to see me. Either scenario is annoying. I need to snap back into reality. He has a girlfriend and there is no 'us' so I need to put a little distance between him and I. I need to stop screwing around with him. I'm starting to realize that I'm making it to easy for him. It's not fair that he gets to have a girlfriend and have me in his life as well. Bottom line is I want more and if I can't have it I need to let him suffer a bit and not be so damn accommodating all the time. I take a moment and than text him.

"Text Homeless Boyfriend...not sure where we are at or how long we are staying...he's around here somewhere."

With that I put my phone away. I'm single and free and he's not my problem.

The cover band finishes up and the DJ kicks in. They continue the 60's theme and start banging out the hits. The crowd rocks. It looks like everyone came in costume but I know better. The crowd is here because they love and live the 60's. This is their everyday attire.

Hippie Chick comes over to me and says, "Give me your car keys. You can't leave until you make out with someone."

I clutch my purse a little tighter.

"Oh. Maybe I should have took your keys before I made that announcement," she says laughing.

Normally I would be all about this challenge. But not tonight. Tonight I'm happy being single. I've had my fill of men for the moment.

I dodge her dare and head back to the dance floor. She joins me with Homeless Boyfriend by her side. We start doing the twist to the latest 60's classic. The host for the evening is dancing up on the stage. He is wearing a tight polyester Hawaiian print button down with a leather vest. He's rocking a pair of tight bell bottom pants and has is long scraggly hair pulled back in a loose ponytail. He looks like he just stepped out of an early 70's porn.

He is rocking on the stage doing what I think is called 'The Fish'. Hippie Chick shoves me towards him. He takes the bait. The Porn Star jumps off the stage into a full split and pops back up to jam with me. I join him and we clear a soul train circle with our antics. He grabs me by my waist and launches me into the air with one push. I land on the stage. No shit. I don't know where his drunken ass found the strength! I may be small but I'm a curvy girl. I wouldn't exactly call myself light.

He jumps up on the stage after me and we continue our show in the spotlight. The Porn Star starts to get a little over zealous and after one of his many exaggerated spins, the man falls off the stage. He falls into the crowd backwards and lands  flat on his back.  I look down and can see  the consfused look on his face. I"m pretty sure he has no memory of the fall. All he knows is that one minute he was jammin on stage with me.The next, he was looking up at me from the floor.  He just lays there for a few trying to figure out where he is.  I suppose I should have jumped down and gave him a helping hand, but come on? I've been left on stage without a dance partner... so I instead decide to take a few minutes to show the crowd what I can do.

I love the stage man. Give me a spotlight and I'll entertain.

The lights are burning down on me and I'm pulling out my best 60's moves. I loved it! After a bit I tire myself out and head back to The Hipsters. Its pretty late and definitely time to go. Mr. Boston and I head out arm and arm and stop to buy a Street Dog. If you haven't had one your missing out. It's a curbside hot dog grilled with onions and bacon wrapped around its porky goodness.

We all split up and head back to The Plex.

I had another great night alone with my Hipster Crew. Men be damned. I don't need them. Man it feels good just being me sometimes.

It's been a while since The Lonely has kicked in. Maybe it's because I'm going to see The Kid this weekend? Maybe the fact that I know I'm going to get layed in a few days is making it easier to be on my own?

Or is it because I'm living with people now?

 I'm not alone anymore. I'm constantly surrounded by people I love and care about. A big change for me. I've been orphaned in Cali for over 10 years now. This is the first time I've been so consistently entertained and adored by people.

Whatever the reason it feels damn good. My depression is definitely gone. I've fought The Lonely back and feeling good and set to move on. Who knows? Maybe my Cool Rider is right around the corner waiting for me to be ready. I'm not there yet but I'm damn close.

Wonder what this weekend will bring? Saturday night I will be with The Kid, but Sunday night he heads home and I'll be left unchaperoned in Vegas!

WCC needs to play. It's been a while since I've set my mark on a man. It's time to train my homing pigeon. To pee on someones leg so that they know they belong to me.

3 more days till Vegas baby! I need to fill some fodder for my blog. It's going to be a blasty blasy.

Clear your schedule dear reader. In just a few more days I'll have some good shit for you.

Till than, goodnight and catch up. I'll be busting out more West Coast Carrie shit talking before you know it.

Love ya,
WCC

Blue Balls

Glasses leaves to Mexico tomorrow...Boo.

He needs to spend a few weeks in Leon for work.  He's not exactly sure when he will be back.  My world is crumbling. Everyone keeps telling me that I'm exaggerating. That he'll be back before I know it. What they don't realize is that we talk daily. We text several times a day. He's my besty and my daily rock. He's my substitute for an actual relationship. His friendship helps keep The Lonely away. Besides, what the hell am I going to do without his ridiculous drunken antics? That shits money man. I'm blue. He better hurry his ass and get back here before I find myself a new drunky party bounce besty.

We decided to have a farewell get together at Partyboys bar tonight. I didn't think I would see PB. He had left to visit his girl in Vegas a few days ago. But he showed up in all his obnoxiously hot glory.

We had been at the bar for about an hour. We all ordered martini's and I was annoying Glasses with my moping. Than in walks Partyboy. He looks directly at me and we lock eyes for a moment. He gives out a few hugs and than makes his way over to where I am sitting. He bends down and gives me a kiss on my cheek. It's funny. I honestly thought that when he come back he would be more distant towards me. I mean he just spent a few days with his girl right? I should be the last person he has thought about, but I got the very real impression that the guy missed me.

I see it the whole night. I'm bouncing around being the life of the party as usual, and he is watching me from the side every chance he gets. He brought a friend with him. Super cool, good looking guy. I spent a lot of time engaging him in conversation. Partially because like I said, the guy was cool. But also to annoy Partyboy. I can't help myself. I love being everyones best friend except for his. I'm not sure how long I plan on torturing him about breaking things off with me. All I know is that for now its seriously one of my favorite pass times.

Glasses is good and drunk by this time as usual. He is making jokes about finding himself a Mexican bride while he's there and about how he plans on growing a beard. In the middle of his rant Partyboy pops his head into our conversation and wants to add his two cents.  "Yeah, be careful with this one. She' ll blue ball ya," he says.

Huh?

"What did you just say?" I asked him, turning in my chair so that I can glare at him properly.

He sort of smiles and turns so that he can talk to Hippie Chick who is sitting on the other side of him. I let it slide but I'm shocked! For one, the comment had nothing to do with the conversation Glasses and I were having. But also because it was the first time that he had ever referenced anything sexual about me since our 'break up'. I roll it over in my head. He had seemed pretty cool with not being able to have sex with me before. He never pressured me or talked shit. I haven't thought about how frustrated that must have left him. Apparently he was still thinking about it enough to throw it out during such an inappropriate occasion. Interesting that it would still bother him even after a return trip from his girl. Man is this boy confused.

And so am I for that matter. I was just having a conversation with Hippie Chick today about how I knew that things were better the way they were. I mean I already knew that he's not the right guy for me. But my heart is battling with my brain. It's so fucking annoying. And the fact that the guy still likes me is making it even harder. I mean for the most part I'm fine. I can hang with him and be friendly and cool. I don't feel any need to try to hook up with him or make something happen. I don't feel like I'm waiting for him or his affections to increase towards me. But whenever the guy walks into the room I get ....well...happy. Ugh.

We all finally head out of the bar. I give Glasses multiple hugs and fake crying before he heads off to his car. Hippie Chick, Homeless boyfriend, Mr. Boston, Partyboy and his friend stay for a while longer just shooting the shit.

"It's raining people, time to go," I say after a bit and start to walk towards the car.

Partyboy snags me and pulls me into a hug. "Come here and say goodbye," he tells me. I give him a quick squeeze and walk away. I know he must note how different I act with him. I mean I had just finished giving Glasses the hug of the century but I seldom even look Partyboy in the face. I can't. I think if I do I'll give away how I feel and I'd rather just come off as an aloof bitch.

Next weekend The Plex household plans on heading off to Vegas. Ringo is performing out there so we are all driving down to support. The Kid and Goodtimes plan on meeting all of us up there. I can't wait. I need something to take my mind off the drama of the last few weeks. Between The Highlanders stalking and all the draining time I've been spending with Partyboy, I'm seriously looking forward to some uncomplicated loven.

I think that there's a small possibility that Partyboy may come as well. That brings up two possible uncomfortable situations. One, if his girl is around I'm not sure how I'll react to the situation. I mean, I think I'll be fine with it but you never know? I mean who will win out? My heart or my brain? I may not have to worry about it though because I think I overheard him say something about her going to visit her family out of state for the next 3 weeks. I can only hope.

Than there is the second issue. I'm going to be there with The Kid. Like I've said before, I'm not really into hanging out with my man in front of an ex. I think it's kind of rude. For both parties. But than again, Partyboy was the one who decided not to be with me so I guess it would sort of serve him right. As for The Kid? He doesn't need to know. We both have a unspoken Don't ask Don't tell understanding.

Guess I'll have to wait and see how this one plays out. I can only handle one drama at a time. Which brings me to a more pressing issue. I may have to see Huge Asshole this weekend.

I haven't seen him since November of last year. The last we spoke was on my Birthday Blast - Fight Night day. As you know that conversation didn't end very well. Now I need to attend Dimples dads 50th birthday party where I know he will be for sure. And damn Glasses is out of town.

I don't want to necessarily bring a date so I need to figure something else out. I'm so tempted to ask Partyboy if he will come with me. I know if I asked there is a strong possibility that he would say yes. It would be so perfect. I mean PB is taller than Huge Asshole and older as well. Huge Asshole's insecure ass would shrink in his seat. There's no way he would come anywhere near me if I brought that guy with me.

But alas, I won't ask. I may have to play this one solo. Who knows? Maybe I'll be able to handle it without an ounce of pain. I mean, I don't cry about him anymore. Hell, I hardly think about him nowadays. Maybe this will be my opportunity to see that I'm totally over him.

I'll let you know how it goes. Whatever happens, I'm sure it'll make a good story. As always, you'll be the first I tell dear reader.

Have a good night ya'll.

Carrie

Starville

So I partied with Gene Simmons son Nick last night. I swear I've been meeting the strangest people lately...


The Hipster crew and I went to a party at the same Hollywood pad that the guys had hot tubbed at during my Birthday Fight Night. We were standing in the living room enjoying the band when we looked over and saw Gene Simmons son Nick kicking it in the corner in all his 6'9 glory. Ofcourse my ridiculous crew was all up in his and his friends mix in two shakes of a lambs tail. He was a cool guy. Didn't drink and was totally digging on Hippie Chick, much to Homeless Boyfriends irritation. She was happy though. It's nice to be reminded that you still got it every once in a while.

I loved the scene. Astro boy was off to the side having a rap contest with a group of randoms. Hippie Chick was basking in the affections of Nick while Homeless Boyfriend glowered from the corner. I was enjoying a drinking game with a set of dice and a drunken hottie. Douchebag was there as well, running around adding the word 'ville' to the end of his words. You know thnigs like, "sucksville" or "partyville". He would throw in an occasional, "That's what she said..." I'm starting to really love this guy. He's freaking hilarious! Man my surroundings have been nutty lately.

Although The Highlander is taking the cake when it comes to being nutty. He has gone from sweet to stalker faster than I can say, "get a life". I hadn't spoken to him since the night he decided to have that awkward I need to "absorb" conversation with me about our relationship status. I had honestly planned on calling him back at some point. I just couldn't bring myself to do it in a timely manner. I mean I've been stressed out at work, I was still dealing with Partyboy finding out about WCC, and quite frankly I just really didn't give a shit.

I had shot him a quick text the next day apologizing for not calling him. Looking back on it, I shouldn't have bothered. His response was annnoying to say the least.

Highlander: "I'm just kinda irritated that you couldn't just shoot me a quick text letting me know we wouldn't be finishing our "talk"?! Especially when I saw you constantly on your phone when you were at my apartment. Just doesn't really seem fair or considerate."

This guy can't be serious? I mean I was out with my friends dude. Why in the hell would you be a priority? And did he just scold me for being on my phone at his house? Get over yourself! Your not my dad. Your not my man.

"I hadn't realized we were planning on finishing our talk last night," I begin. "Plus I had still planned on calling you. I passed out. And I was texting you at my dinner. Until we began to eat so I stopped because I got yelled at."

God I'm starting to feel like I'm in a relationship with this guy! Of which I'm not. So annoying. But not as annoying as his next text.

"That's kinda odd because you specifically told me that we were gonna continue our talk after you were done with dinner," he starts with an air of hysteria," that's what your text confirmed as well. But regardless, I wasnt' asking you to call me while you were with your friends because that's just rude!I just believe it would have been courteous and respectful to shoot me a simple text saying we'd continue the conversation some other night. That's all. Pretty simple I think Especially since you made a point of mentioning that the talk was awkward. So it would seem that it's better to diffuse the 'weird' factor sooner rather than later."

I think diffusion is sort of an impossibility at this point buddy.

"Ok dude, let's move on. This is way to deep of a convo." I text back.

I'm over this whole thing! I wanted to be cool with him but he's acting like a pissed off boyfriend. I don't like getting scolded by a semi total stranger. I mean we only saw eachother one time! Who the hell does he think he is to me? This is getting stranger and stranger by the minute. I mean I'm starting to feel like I'm on the witness stand being crossed examined by a psycho.

"I really don't and didn't want to make it into a whole big production," He says.

Ha, that ship has sailed dude.

"Just seems to have played out that way," he continues. "Wait, what do you mean 'move on'? Go our separate ways or?!"

There's a split second where I consider taking this 'out'. I know I should tell him let's move on from eachother. But I don't because I'm still a nice fucking person.


Instead I tell him, "No. From this weird conversation."

"Ok. That's fine." he replies. I could feel his relief through my phone.

I stop texting him at this point. There's no where for me to take this conversation. Mercifully he leaves me alone. For the night that is. The next day I wasn't so lucky. I hadn't text him for almost 12 whole hours. For a weirdo loner like him that must have seemed like an eternity.

"No text? No call again?" he sends.

It's been a day dude. Relax.
I don't respond. I can't deal with this guy anymore.

"I really don't understand you!," he continues after about 20 minutes of texting silence. "All along you've been interacting with me and giving me a different impression, urging us to see each to eachother."

Oh my freaking god! Keep in mind people. It's been maybe 4 days since our initial meeting and now I'm receiving this psycho text. Atleast it looks like it's over now. I resist the urge to respond with something like,"Smell ya later," and continue on with my night.

The next day I go over to Glasses house to watch a movie and eat some food. When I arrived Partyboy was there. I was nervous. I hated the awkwardness from the other night. I preferred his overbearing affections to his distant anger.

But he was good. Not the same as before, but good. We all laughed and hanged and watched movies. Than we all completely passed out and had an impromptu slumber party. The next morning we got up and drank some coffee together. It was nice. I was having a super chill, and sober hang out with the Partyguys.

Glasses says his goodbyes and heads off to work. Partyboy and I stay a bit longer shooting the shit. We take Glasses dog out for a walk and continue our small talk. It's the first time I've ever held a normal conversation with the guy. In the past we were just make out central. Than we hit the awkward phase with his unwanted affections and transitioned right into him hating me for a night. But today? He's actually chilling with me like a friend. We head back into the house and I decide to read him a little WCC. I hate that The Whistle Blower left Partyboy with the impression that I was talking shit about him on my blog. I don't consider that what I'm doing. I talk about how I feel about things. I talk about me.

I read him 'New Year's with Partyboy' and 'Cravings'. I wanted to give him an idea of who I am and what I do without stumbling across anything to graphic or rude. He dug it. And he relaxed. Good.

We head out and he asks me what I'm going to do for the day. "Just run some errands and things. Why what's up?" I ask.

"Well there is this really cool coffee shop I like to hang out at. I just take my computer and chill there. Drink some green tea and such." he says.

"Well, if that's all your doing why don't you just run my errands with me and than we can go check out your spot after?" I ask him.

He agrees and we head back to The Plex together.

We walk in and say hi to Homeless Boyfriend who is sitting at his computer. I sit Partyboy down at my desk so that he can screw around on my computer while I get dressed. Just than Hippie chick opens her bedroom door and pops her head out.

I wish I could have taken a picture of her face. She takes one look at me and Partyboy together and her face splits into this huge grin. I walk away not able to stop myself from breaking out into the same silly smile. Man she loves it when Partyboy and I are together. She told me later that day that the energy that the two of us have when we are together is intense. She's right. We would be a sight to see as a couple. But we're not. So I settle for building a friendship with him. For now.

I shower and change while the boys hang out and smoke out. I'm smiling in the shower. Today is going to be interesting.

I finish up and we head out together. I need to drop off my old keys and cable box. He drives around town with me comfy as can be. About halfway through our day I stop by my favorite Jamaican joint near mid city. I buy us a few chicken patties and than head next door to We Jammin to order some fresh juices. Partyboy tries to give me some money for the patties. "Don't worry about it," I tell him. "I'm dragging you around with me, the least I can do is feed you."

"No really take it. I don't want your readers to think that Partyboy is cheap," he tells me smiling.

He is so freaking cute. "It's fine," I laugh. "I got it really."

He puts his money away until it's time to pay for our fresh blended juices. I let him pay for it. We're getting along and I want to keep him in a good mood.

After I finish my errands we head to Trader Joe's. I owe Mr. Boston and Homeless boyfriend dinner for helping me move so I want to pick up my supplies for the evening. Partyboy brings me a basket right as my phone rings. I look down and its The Highlander.

My heart starts to pound a mile a minute. Hippie Chick told me later that it was my bodies way of telling me that I was in danger. No kidding. I mean why was he calling me? Any other guy would have understood the blow off signals by now and moved on.

I let it go to voicemail, not thinking for a minute that the guy would actually leave a message. He does.

Don't worry reader. I'm going to figure out a way that I can link up his voicemail so that you all can listen to it. It is money man. The guy leaves me a 2:28 second voicemail. Do you have any idea how long a 2 minute voicemail is? Long man. Long.

I don't respond. Partyboy and I head back to The Plex. He knows I'm freaked. I let him listen to the voicemail. I don't get much of a response from him. I have a feeling he doesn't exactly want to discuss my other 'relationships' with me.

I get home and start in on dinner. I plan on making my world famous lasagna with garlic bread with lots of red wine.

The heavens were shining down on me that day because the lasagna came out amazing.

I had text Glasses earlier to come over after work to eat. It was so nice. I set up a 6 foot table in our dining room and we all sat down to enjoy my feast. It was Homeless boyfriend, Hippie Chick, Mr. Boston, Glasses and Partyboy. Man do I love my crew.

"Someone should say a blessing." Glasses says.

They all look to me.

Everyone links hands and I start in on my speech,"Well, I guess I just want to say how happy I am that I'm here with all of you. I love to cook but not when I'm alone. I'm so excited that I get to come home to all of you everyday and that I got to feed you all tonight. You are my LA Fam Bam and I love you."

Everyone 'Ahh's" and we lift our glasses for a toast. I'm loving it. Just a few months ago I was depressed and alone in my scary old apartment and now? Well, life is good man. Life is good.

I had played the message from the Highlander to Hippie Chick before dinner. I wanted her opinion on what I should do. She had told me that we should pose the question to the guys. We are done with our meal and just sitting around the table drinking wine when Hippie Chick gets everyones attention. "Ok guys. Carrie needs some help. Tell them the back story Carrie."

I give the table a quick rundown of the last few days events. They all ask a few questions and than we quite down so that I can play the voicemail for them. I place my phone in the middle of the table and turn on my speaker. The Highlanders voice echos in the quite dining room.

"Hey Carrie. It's me. It's been a couple of days since I've heard from you. So... and... uh you havent' responded to my text messages so I'm assuming that inspite of what you texted me that you don't want us to go our separate ways...well now your not talking to me anymore and you don't want to be friends..so that's uh. Makes me sad...." The guys snort in unison at this line. Mr. Boston and Hippie Chick are busting up. This is way more fun than I thought it was going to be. I start to feel better and a lot less freaked. The message continues.

"Especially since it was over a quote unquote 'awkaward conversation' that we had." (Oh god. The guy is quoting me again.)"....and the conversation should have been continued so that it would have moved out of that stage. And it never was. Instead it was continued via text and that's not the best medium to have resolved anything or reached any kind of conclusion. Anyhow I just want to tell you that uh I would hope that you would call me so that we can talk this out."

The guys in the room start to debate. They think that The Highlander is coming to an end and want to discuss what a freak he is. I quite them down. The Highlander isn't done yet. There is still a minute and 28 seconds to go....

"I like having you in my life. It took alot of courage on my part, for lack of a better word, to initially contact you and than to move it to the point where I would see you. Your the only person I've seen outside of the people I've already known in the last 7 months."

Bingo! The room erupts again. "That's what it is," says Glasses. "Your the only person he's spoken to in ages. He's clinging onto you for dear life."

Just than Hippie Chick nudges me from under the table. Partyboy had stood up about 20 seconds into the voicemail and left the room. He mumbled something like,"I've already heard this." He was now walking around trying to find something to do. At the time I thought he was just restless. I wouldn't doubt if the guy had a mild case of ADD. "That's not it," HC tells me later. "He didn't want to listen to the voice mail. He likes you dude."

Great. I have a stalker that wants me and a ex lover who can't have me because he's an idiot. Man being single is a pain in the ass sometimes.

The Highlanders voice is still carrying across the room, "...and that should mean something to you. Um...I just would like to..I don't want to end things on these terms. I would like to atleast be able to talk to you to straighten some things out if it's possible and if its not than to just not leave it where we have...based on our last conversation. Because that conversation was I guess kind of awkward. It was difficult for me to have with you but I thought that we were both on the same page. And it would have been mature and respectful to know where we were each coming from and know what the expectations were. So hopefully I'll hear from you. Um, I don't know what else to say or do since obviously communication requires two people to participate and you've chosen for whatever reason to not to at this point.....Um....I hope your well and like I said I hope to hear from you soon...take care...bye."

We all sit in silence for a minute letting the crazy sink in.

"Don't call him back," Homeless Boyfriend tells me. "One word from you and his obsession will start all over again. He'll just want to debate anything you say and talk you out of it."

"So you guys were dating?" Mr. Boston asks.

"No. I told him from the beginning I wasn't interested in dating."I respond.

"Dude, she only hung out with him one time," Hippie Chick chimes in."She sat and had coffee with him and that's it. The guy is majorly off."

We continue our debate for a while longer until HC decided that we should all make a Yogurtland trip. We pile into the cars and raid the local yogurt shop. Glasses has to work in the morning so he heads home. Partyboy jumps back in the car with us.

We head back to the Plex and continue our wine drinking. I'm good and toasted at this point so I go into my room and sit on my bed to watch some tv. Partyboy walks in and asks if I could give him a ride home.

"Sure," I tell him. "Just give me a sec to relax."

I'm lying. I'm a little drunk and a lot tired and am loving the idea of hanging out with PB for the night. I mean we had a great day. No awkwardness. No weird sexual chemistry. Just friendly and cool and fun.

He lays down on the floor. I have an awesome 4 inch thick shag carpet in my bedroom so I know he's comfy. I throw him down a pillow and count the seconds before Mr Narcolepsy passes out. It doesn't take long. He's out like a light within 15 minutes. I cover him with a blanket and than slip into my bed.

I get a text from Glasses right before I drift off to sleep. "I'm glad you guys made up and are able to hang again."

I smile. Me too.

The next morning Partyboy wakes up before me and asks if I can give him a ride home. It's raining outside and he's hoofing it.

I get up and quickly throw on some clothes. He has an appointment he needs to get to and I'm feeling really guilty for making him stay...ok. I don't feel that guilty, but I should drive him none the less.

We head out and he asks if I want to grab some coffee at his spot. He really wants to show it to me. Cute.

We walk in and I instantly love it. Its a large coffee shop with two patios and tons of little hidden nooks with drinkers and readers hanging out with their laptops and espressos. He grabs himself a green tea and pays for my tea latte.

We go outside to take a seat next to one of the fire pits.

"Hey, how you doing man," Partyboy says to a man sitting in the corner. He's older, with a bit of scruffiness on his chin and that layered directors look. PB introduces me and we take a seat at the table across from him.

We all start to chit chat and I find out that this guy is a somebody. An old songwriter/rockstar/actor. He's sister helped shape the career of Leonardo Di Caprio and he helped Madonna to gain some focus back in the day.

Partyboy has done some modeling and promo work. He may have even done some movie work but I'm not sure. I've never really asked. This guy starts to give him some advice. I'll call him the Hollywood Guru.

"One thing you need to do man, is dress down a bit more. Your a really good looking guy. To good looking. You need to switch up your style. Walk into agencies looking more normal. These people can tell a faker in a second. You need to let your worth ethic and drive proceed you. You do have a great lookbut you'd have better luck if you do what beautiful women do. For instance Michelle Pfeiffer. She is stunning in person. So she often goes out without any makeup. Without it she still looks amazing but more versatile. They are more apt to take her seriously. And you need to find out what your character is going to be. Create the kind of person people want to watch. For instance if you look at Robert De Niro early work. The man was well..."

"Bland," I offer.

"Exactly!" he responds. "He had to figure out how to use is looks and strangeness in a way that made people want to watch him for hours. You should get a video camera. Record yourself. Learn your face. Control it and make it work for you. All stars have one thing in common. They have a darkness to them. The casual observer doesn't realize that ofcourse. All they see is a star. But trust me. That drive and darkness is there. Bubbling under the surface. Pushing these people to stand out and work harder and focus on who they are and who they want to be."

I'm loving the conversation. The Guru isn't one of those guys who name drops. The man is just dropping names.

"So what do you do?"He asks looking over at me.

"She's a writer," Partyboy answers.

I smile. It's the first time I've heard someone call me that, and of all people the words come out of Partyboys mouth.

"Really? What do your write?" The Guru asks me, looking genuinely interested.

"I write about my life out here in Hollywood. I run with a crazy collection of artists and creatives. I write about who they are and who I date." I tell him.

"Yeah, she and I used to 'hang out' for a bit...and I just found out about all of this." Partyboy adds.

"Found out? What do you mean?" the Guru asks.

"Well, I'm sort of blogging out my pages right now to the public. Letting them help shape my writing. Only a chosen few know that I do this. Partyboy was never supposed to know. It just sort of happened."

"Ok ok, so do you write about everyone or do you just concentrate on a few characters?"Guru asks me.

"I write about anyone that I have an emotional connection to. I keep my characters pretty one dimensional although I've began to flesh out a few. I pick the mood and emotion that I feel for them and I go from there.Everyone is anonymous. Everyone has a nickname. I write about my surface thoughts about them and my life. You know, the shit talking that all of us do in our heads but never act on. Well that's what WCC is made up of. She is unfiltered and raw. She is my inner monologue. A lot of people have been able to relate."

"So have you thought about turning it into a screen play?" he asks me.

Only in Hollywood man. Everyone either wants to be in front of the camera or behind it. I'm not interested in either. Atleast not when it comes to my writing

"No." I respond, probably shocking him. "If someone comes along and wants to do something like that for me that's fine. But that's not what I want to do with this. I love to read. I love to write. I want this to be a book. Hell, maybe a series of books. I'm a good 2 years out from that though so for now I'll just keep blogging out my pages. Than hopefully when I'm ready to publish I'll already have a fan base. I plan on making business cards and dropping them in bars with my Blogspot url. I'm going to have stickers made that I can start to put up in bathroom stalls. I want to keep WCC underground. I love the process and I want to do this right. We'll see what happens."

He looks at me and smiles. "You see that?" he says looking over at Partyboy. "That's what I'm talking about. I was pushing a few buttons right now. I wanted to throw out the screenplay idea to see what she would say. She knows what she wants. She is someone who is in control of her craft. Her moves are intentional. She is smart and focused and I wouldn't be surprised if in a years time she has the biggest blog in the nation."

This man officially rocks. We sit and chit chat with him for about an hour. I wish I could have recorded the conversation. He truly was an interesting character. Than again, most stars are. It's what makes us all want to watch.

Partyboy is now running late so we say our goodbyes and I take him home. He gives me a quick hug and thanks me for the last few days. I drive away and he shoots me one last text. "Thanks again for the adventures, the gluttonous bliss and saving the day!"

I had a great few days with him. I always say that Glasses is my heart. Well so is Partyboy. We definitely have a connection. We don't need to be in a relationship for me to enjoy it. I just love kicking it in this guys space. I'm glad that he found out about WCC. Atleast now I can actually get to know him.

No more boys for me though. I'm just going to write. Keep my focus. Find my inner darkness and become that person that people want to watch.

I drive home running everything the Guru had said to us in my mind. I love what I do. I know what I want. And I'm glad that someone recognized that.

Hopefully I'll see you soon Hollywood Guru. Just know, I plan on proving you right.


WCC

Absorb This

Partyboy knows. About me. About Carrie. Shit.

I went out with the Hipster crew last night to a party at The Street Artist House.  We had stayed out till 5am the night before so we were all pretty tired.  A mellow houseparty sounded awesome.  As always it was a blasty blast. One of the crew was dj'ing all night as the rest of us ran around bouncing off of each others energies. 

The Twisty Twins from New Year's Eve were there with a few additional members to their bedazzled group.  Theses girls are a funny bunch. Underaged, underweight and overdressed as usual. They have a ring leader. A blond straight out of Mean Girls. They cling to Hippie Chick and I hoping to ride on our popularity. I'm dancing around the living room on my own when the ring leader comes over to groove with me. Whatever. More the merrier. Except she gets closer than I would prefer. Than the rest of her group roll up on us and now I'm dancing in this tight little Twisty Circle.

Like I've said before, I don't need a partner to dance and I definitely don't need this type of safety in numbers attitude. I break free from their insecurities and hop my way over to an empty area of the living room.

 The Street Artist comes over and pulls me off to the side. Our fake relationship on Facebook has been progressing nicely. Over the last 2 weeks since the Foo Fighters concert our status has gone from "It's Complicated" to "In a Relationship". We have taken to writing each other wall messages about our dates. Of which we've had none ofcourse but it helps with the authenticity of our relationship.

He takes my drink from out of my hand and places it on the end table. Than he gets down on one knee and produces a thin silver $5 ring from his pocket. "Carrie, will you be with my forever, sometimes?" He asks me.

I laugh and tell him yes as he slips the ring on my finger. He stands up and gives me a kiss on my cheek.
"So should we post that I'm knocked up on Facebook to help explain our quick engagement?" I ask him.

"No no. It's to soon," he tells me panicked. "We need to make this legit. Let's give it like a month. My co-workers have barely started congratulating me on my change in relationship status."

I laugh and agree to wait. This gag has started to take on a life of it's own. But I have no commitments or love interest at the moment so if I can display a healthier fake relationship than real I'm all about it.

We head out of the party at around 3am. I shoot Glasses a text to find out how his night went. He had gone to a party at the Playboy Mansion that evening so I was hoping to score some details.

"Where are you at," he sends me back.

"Leaving the houseparty now," I tell him.

"Come pick me up. Let's go to Douchebags," he sends.

Sounds good to me. I head over to Glasses house with Hippie Chick, Homeless Boyfriend and Astro Boy. Hippie Chick is good and loaded and ready to go home. Astro has been nursing a sprained ankle for a few days so he is ready to roll also. But Homeless Boyfriend and I? Well we're ready to party with The Party Guys.  It's 2 against 2. We win out due to the fact that I'm the one driving the car.

I know I should be going home. I only got about 3 hours sleep the night before and I have to work again the next morning. But it had been a few weeks since I'd been out so I didn't want to end the night so early.

Well, that's not the whole truth. Honestly I was hoping to see Partyboy. I missed that guy. I hadn't seen him in a few weeks, partially because I was busy. And also because his girlfriend had came into town the weekend before. I was careful to avoid any areas where I could run into them.  I'm not at a place where I could comfortably hang with the two of them. I was just barely getting used to the strange relationship he and I were building.

We get to Douchebags and Glasses and I walk up the stairs ahead of the group arm and arm. We open the front door and see a few bodies lying under blankets in the living room. The one on the couch is Partyboy. He is curled up under the blankets with a spiky haired blond. The second he sees me he freezes. Hell even I had that feeling of busting his ass. He immediately jumps up off the coach and tackles Glasses.  After a struggel Glasses manages to dislodge himself from under PB. He heads to teh bedrooms to say hi to the rest of the Party Gang.  Partyboy looks up at me from the floor and says, "Come down here and give me a hug."

He must be kidding? I just walked in on you snuggling with some ugly blond and now you want some floor time with me? No thanks.  I jump over his torso and continue through the apartment to say hi to Douchebag and the other roomies. I'd much prefer a Douch hug than a fake 'I have a girlfriend so this means nothing other than I'm trying to be cute'', squeeze.

Partyboy hops back up after I dodge him just in time for Hippie Chick to pull him into the kitchen as she walks through the door.

I didn't think anything of it at the time, until Glasses clued me into the behind the scene info. I guess in her drunken state Hippie Chick had decided to give him a piece of her mind about us.  She told him to stop treating me like shit. That he was an idiot for not being with me. That there was no way he was really into his girl.

He countered that he was in love.

"Because you feel obligated," she tells him with a punch in his arm.

"No, she stayed with me through alot of stuff. I love her. We're gonna get married," he says.
(Yeah. That's called obligation.)

That line made me giggle. Seriously dude? It's not that I don't think that the guy has genuine feelings for her. I know he does. I just can't stop thinking of them as two dumb kids playing grown up.  I've been married. I know what it should look like and how one should act. Partyboy had..slash that. Has real feelings for me. He wouldn't feel that way if he had marriage emotions for his girl. That's not the way it works buddy.  And don't even get me started about his snuggle time antics with the spiky hair girl that I walked in on earlier.

I guess she berated him for a while. I was clueless at the time.  All I knew was that he was on my jock a little more than usual that night. He kept telling me to not ,"be a brat" and saying that he loved me. He kept wrapping his arms around me and actually gave me a few kisses on my cheek. As usual I tried to avoid him as much as possible. He still treats me like a girl he's into and its maddening. I never stay friends with guys I hook up with. I'm a out of sight out of mind kind of girl. I only tolerate his presence because I have to. He is best friends with Glasses and I'm best friends with Glasses so we all just deal with our twisted friendship Triangle.

After an hour we all head out. Partyboy walks us down stairs. I walk ahead of the crowd to pull up the car trying to avoid any uncomfortable goodbyes from him. Everyone piled in and I drove off right when I think he was trying to walk around to say goodbye to me. Sorry dude. Don't want to deal.

The next day I'm exhausted at work. HC and HB have plans to go to a huge house warming party in Silver Lake. I can't do it. I call up Glasses instead to see what he's doing. He answers the phone totally wasted. At 5pm. Drunkard.

"Come down," he slurs to me. "It's 'Chicken Parmesan' Night."

I laugh. He's been chanting the words,"Chicken Parmesan Night" for three days like its an event instead of just food.  I'm in. A good dinner with friends sounds perfect. Plus I love when Glasses is drunk. He's funny as shit.

That's when I hear a voice in the backround. It's Partyboy. Should have known he would be there.  It actually motivates me more to head over. What can I say? I'm a glutton for punishment.

I head over at around 7pm. Right before I step up to the door I get a call from The Highlander. He had texted me earlier asking if everything was ok. He said that I had seemed distant every since our meeting.

Yes. That's right. I finally met the elusive Highlander. And man was it a let down. I mean he definitely resembled the photo he had sent me with the exception of his bad teeth and funny shaped head. He looked to be about 25lbs lighter. Weight loss from the accident I suppose. He also looked about 15 years older than the photo I had seen. Which I'm sure he was. He was shorter than I had hoped as well. The combination of his weight, height and aged look was his downfall. I couldn't do it. I wasn't attracted. I had went out for coffee with him and had an ok time. I mean he was still the same person. Same warm look in his eyes, same easy banter we always had. I just wasn't into him.

So he calls me up and we had the most uncomfortable conversation ever. Long story short he wanted to know if I had any feelings for him. Not that he was pressuring me into a relationship or anything. He just wanted to know if the door was open. You know, be friends now and than when I was ready forge into a relationship?

I'm dying. I mean it's more than a little premature to be having this conversation. I had barely even given the guy a hug the other night. You'd think he would have taken the hint. Apparently not. I don't want to lie to him or lead him on. I'm totally not interested. I decide to lay it down for him.

 I tell him that I'm not interested in being more than friends. I'm not looking for a relationship and I don't even want to have to think about when I would be ready for something like that. Plus, I wouldn't be interested in getting together with him. He just had so much going on in his life right now. I didn't want to be included in dealing with the aftermath of his accident. I had spent most of my adult life taking care of the men I was with. Time and time again I would jump into relationships with guys who drained me of all my good will and energy. I always feel the need to take care of others. Right now I was trying really hard to just take care of me for a change.

"Not that I think that's what you would do. I just don't want to be in that position again. I need to try to be me right now. I get tired just thinking about it." I tell him.

Ok so I'm not being completely honest with him. But I figure this statement is better than telling him that I think his head is funny looking.

"Well I don't think that's really an issue," he tells me. "I wouldn't do that to you."

Grrr.

"I know. But you asked me how I felt. You wanted to know if you should invest time in me romantically so I'm being honest with you. I'm not. I think your way cool though. I really do want to still know you. I want us to be friends.."

"Ok," he says. "Well I think I need to absorb this for a second."

Huh? He needs to 'absorb'? Absorb what? Gay.

"Ok well I just got to my friends house so why don't you absorb and I'll give you a call later ok?" I send him.

"Ok," he says. I hang up. OMG. Did that just really happen? I feel so drained and down. I hate being put into that position. I don't like being responsible for someone else's feelings. I shouldn't have to be in this situation. I mean we had met ONE time. That's it.  The whole point of me being single is so that I don't have to deal with this shit.

I knock on the door and Partyboy answers. Instead of a hello he tells me, "Hi Blogger."

Great.

"Oh, ha. Hi," I say back. I'm too upset about my Highlander conversation to engage so I give him a quick hug instead and walk in. Glasses and his roommate are in the kitchen along with the whistle blower himself.

I had met WB during the Superbowl party. We had bonded over our individual artistry's. He was a writer to, and I had read him a few of my blogs. He gave me some great advise and had unofficially become my new writing partner. The downside was he apparently didn't know how to keep his mouth shut about it.

"I'm so sorry Carrie," he tells me when I walk in. " I didn't know that I shouldn't tell him."

"What part of don't tell anyone about this didn't you understand?" I ask.

"I'm sorry. I'm sorry. Look, I think you two should talk this out. I think Partyboy has some unresolved issues about this." he says pushing me towards Partyboy.

I look over at him. He's right. I could see it all over Partyboys face. He barely gave me a hug when I walked in and he is totally avoiding eye contact with me now. I mean last night I couldn't keep the guy off me. Now he looked...well...kind of broken.

"What issue's do you have?" I ask him.

"What? I don't have issues," he responds, still not looking at me. "I'm cool. Honestly I don't really care. This conversation is just not really very interesting to me. Lets smoke." he says as he reaches for the bong.

"See. He's fine. Let's move one." I tell WB.

But it's never that simple. Like I've said before. Men are sensitive creatures that can't handle shit. Partyboy is no exception. He is weird with me for the rest of the night. Usually I can't get him to leave my side, but the entire evening he actually goes so far as to avoid being in the same room with me.

I'm upset. I mean first I had to deal with The Highlander, and now this?  I don't want to be responsible for other people's emo! Arg. My only reprieve that evening came from Glasses's drunken antics.

First we couldn't get him out of his bedroom for dinner. He had locked himself in with the sound of running water. I finally coerced him to open the door. I found him hot tubbing it in his board shorts. He looked so funny laying in his tub under the bubbles.  His roommate came in and pulled his ass out.

We all sat at the dinner table to eat the famous 'Chicken Parmesan.' Glasses was right. It wasn't just food. It was an Event. We lit some candles and poured some wine and ate our brains out. Next time 'Chicken Parmesean' night comes around, I'll be spreading the word.

After dinner Glasses begins to hop around the room calling himself a Tiger Cub. He would jump up onto the fireplace, his hands drawn up under his chin like paws and bucking his teeth like a rabbit. "I'm gonna pounce on you like a Tiger Cub," he kept announcing...right before hurling himself at anyone within his jumping range.

I finally got him to lay down on the couch. I was sitting next to him and Partyboy was sitting next to me. It's the closest we had been the entire night. I was looking at Glasses's roommate in the other room when I felt PB's eyes on me. I could tell he was looking at me pretty intently. "Interesting."  I hear him say under his breath.

I look at him and he looks away.  The comment is still haunting me. I mean, what did he mean by that? What's interesting? Why is he being so emo?

It gets late and I put Glasses to bed. Literally. I tuck him in and hang around his room until he drifts off to sleep. Partyboy lays down next to him and immediately pass's out. I walk over to the bed and lay next to him so that I can draw on his hands with the black pen I found. I put a teardrop on one and three dots on the other. I draw smiley faces on the balls of both his hands and an X on his index fingers...with the matching O's on his middle fingers. I consider drawing on his face but then decide against it. He's already pissed at me. Lord knows what he'd do if I messed up his pretty boy face.

I gather my things and turn off the bedroom light.

I'm a bit blue as I drive home. At first I think its because of the conversation I had with the Highlander. But if I'm being honest with myself, I know it has more to do with Partyboy. My sadness quickly turns into anger. I mean what the hell? What right does he have to be upset with me? I mean he was the one who stopped seeing me. He's the one that decided to get back with his out of state ex. He doesn't have the right to have feelings for me anymore and he sure as hell shouldn't be hurt by me.  I was the one he used to keep himself warm until he got back to his girl so you know what? I've decided that I'm pissed at his ass.

It's kind of liberating actually. Now he won't hang on me all the time. Now he won't try to be cute and place his forehead against mine when he speaks to me. No more gazing at me from across the room or trying to let everyone know that he knows who I am. Be with your girl man. Leave me alone. You can't have both of us.

I want more. Deserve more. More than you.

I get home and receive another text from The Highlander.
"Guess were not continuing our talk tonight? :( " he sends.

Seriously dude? God tonight is draining.

"No sad face...I just got home. Long hang out as usual. I'm gonna pass out now." I send back, trying to lighten the mood.

"So when will we finish our talk?" he replies.

Finish what talk dude? What does this guy want to talk about? I mean, I've said my peace. Either he wants to be cool and be friends or he doesn't. No more long drawn out conversations necessary.

I don't respond. Partially because I honestly don't know what to say. I'm upset over Partyboy and could give a shit less about The Highlanders unusually clingy request. But also it's because I'm stoned and two seconds away from passing out. I smoked with Partyboy earlier and was barely holding onto to reality.  I slip away a few minutes after his last text.

The next day Glasses gives me a call. "I really think that I need to stop hanging out with you. Your just way to crazy for me," he says.

I laugh and ask how he's feeling.

"Ok. I was so trashed. Thank you for taking care of me. I think everyone needs someone like you in their friend circle." he says.

"What do you mean by that?" I ask him.

"You know, your always sober and you take care of us." he replies.

Funny and totally true. I take in. I take care and I occasionally take over. It's who I am.

"Dude. Partyboy was so weird with me last night. He acted all hurt." I tell him.

"You know what I think? I think he feels like an asshole about what happen between you guys. Aannnddd, I think he still likes you." he says.

"I know he does. And its not fair. He made his decision. I'm over it."

Alright. I'm lying again. I'm not over it or over him. Not just yet. But I'm getting there. It's not easy. True chemistry is hard to find and he and I have it. I need to create some distance so that I can calm those feelings down.

Damn hormones. Always making horrible decisions for me. I need to put those assholes in check.

So Partyboy found out about my alter ego. What ever. He's not my problem anymore.  And now that I think about it neither is The Highlander. I refuse to feel bad for not liking someone. I need to be true to me and my feelings.

I think I'm going to put a pause on the whole dating thing. Maybe become a nun. Or a lesbian.

Oh who am I kidding. I'll just take my new found bitterness out on the road again.  Save your emo for your relationships boys.

I'm WCC. Still single and free.